Burning Rain
by ATILT
Summary: 2 years Post-Breaking Dawn. With Bella's life as a vampire seemingly perfect, her family attempts to solidify alliances. However, new rumors arise about the role of the Cullen family in the vampire world, rumors the Volturi cannot ignore ON HIATUS
1. Preface

**This story continues two years after the events of Breaking Dawn. A companion piece will be written alongside to give more graphic details for those readers interested in more background! Enjoy and Review!**

It was the same nightmare, coming to haunt me again from those days when my dreams were so vivid. The rigid training put into use as an array of black cloaks glided toward us.

"So soon we are back to such an unfortunate situation." One of the cloaks of deepest black said politely, a glimmer of triumph behind his carefully considered tone.

Such a similar field, a similar background to impending doom. We thought we had forever but is this it? I knew it would come to this day, I just wish we had more time, wish I was strong enough to see it coming.

The rain burned me as I considered options but knew there were none. All our carefully laid plans put to ruin.

Because this time we couldn't fight. This time we were powerless in the face of our corrupted leadership. This time we knew that death was the likely result for all. This time everything was different.

After all, how could I fight my own family?


	2. A New Dawn

I stood outside our cottage, feeling myself bathed in moonlight though my eyes were closed. I tried to concentrate by letting my senses range, still reveling in my new senses. I was amazed at how attuned my ears were to my surrounding, hearing crickets from miles away, cars speeding down the highway and, so close, my child sleeping.

Smells drifted towards me as I inhaled the night air. Elk drinking from a nearby stream with their thick, heavy blood pumping through their veins. Musty smells of pine and sap from the trees as the summer rapidly moved toward fall. And of course, the rapidly approaching smell of my husband as he raced through the woods, slowing to a walk as he saw me unmoving.

Edward walked to me, silently taking his place at my side. "Bella?"

"Yes?" I replied, leaving my eyes closed for the moment.

"What are you doing out here, my love?" He questioned, the slightest bit of fear tingeing his voice. "Is Nessie ok?"

I opened my eyes and turned to him, as always, momentarily stunned by the beauty of his body and eyes. "Everyone's fine" I assured him. "It's just... frustraing that I have been a vampire for almost two years and yet I still can get overwhelmed with the sights and sounds around me, their range and depth."

He sighed with relief. "It takes time my love. You have already proven yourself to be far more than any average new vampire. It will take a while for your vision, hearing and, well, thirst, to be totally under control."

Simply being in his presence calmed me further, awakening new senses as I gently pulled him toward our cottage, our little home in the deep woods. I heard my daughter's heart thrumming in the background, her sighing as she turned, allowing sleep to make her unaware of the throbbing, vital world around her. A world my sharpened senses could no longer ignore.

"There are other urges I'm having less success controlling" I smiled, looking up into his amber eyes that still held the power to make me nearly as clumsy as when I was a human.

His lips curled into the little half smile I loved so much. "Well we'll have to test your restraint, won't we?" He smirked and pulled me into a cradle in his arms. "After all, we have all the time in the world!"

The start of my new life, and I couldn't be happier. Still, something out there in the dark awoke another sense, tensing to feel what was coming. It might have been the extent of my current happiness that I was constantly waiting for the other shoe to drop, but I could feel it in the air. Change was coming. Good or bad, I couldn't tell.

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After expending some of our never-ending store of energy, we lay on our bed, as I stared in wonder at the beautiful body of my husband.

"How strange it is to think that just two years ago I would have broken you at the gentlest touches I gave." Edward exhaled.

I smiled. "And I am so happy that we don't have to worry about that anymore!" Laughing as I pulled myself onto him again to cuddle into his perfect body as the sky lightened outside.

Hearing our daughter stir in the other room, I stood up and wandered into my enormous new closet, grimacing at the mounds of silk and lace .

"Getting dressed so soon?" Edward joked gently as I finally found a pair of jeans to match with a simple deep blue t-shirt.

"Come on lazy," I joked. "Time to start the day!"

"If that's the case…" he replied, bounding out of bed and, in the blink of an eye, donning a new pair of khakis with a pale green button-down. "Let's get started!"

We slipped into our daughter's room as she stirred in her bed. Though she had only seen almost two human years of life, she already resembled a rapidly growing child of 12, awareness starting to flicker in her eyes of her approach to womanhood. She grew, and learned, rapidly. A moment of panic hit me as I realized that my little girl, growing so quickly, would soon be seeking the same kind of independence and free will that it had taken me my whole childhood to realize. The freedom from overseeing parental eyes, though I felt I had always been the parent in my household, Renee seemed to be the child who snuck out to meet boys and gushed over them to me.

I looked at my husband and saw the same anxiety in his face. As we locked eyes, my determination and wavering resolve solidified. Our next step was necessary. If we couldn't give our child her childhood, we would certainly allow her the freedom to pursue her own life, unencumbered by the heavy weights of her parents' eternal future, or even the connection to my best friend. Edward nodded slightly at me. It was what had to be done.

Her chocolate brown eyes flickered open to see us standing over her.

"Good morning beautiful," I said, a broad smile on my face as she looked up.

"Mom! Dad!" She cried as her eyes flew open, pulling the covers up tight around her neck. Her self-consciousness was rapidly taking hold of her ability to talk and be with us. I recognized those same tendencies from hazy human recollections of relating to Charlie after arriving in Forks. The need for privacy. It had taken me 16 years to get to that point. Another twinge of sadness when I realized my child was growing far too quickly.

"I'm getting up! Can I have some privacy, _please_?!" She blushed bright red.

I rolled my eyes and heard Edward exhale behind me. We bent down and kissed her. "We'll wait outside. Love you!"

"Love you guys too." She called after, her small triumph won.

She got dressed in the usual, jeans with some designer top I didn't recognize, and joined us outside. Though she had picked up my simplicity of style, we couldn't hold off from Alice not only building Renesmee her own walk-in closet, but also fully stocking it with designer shirts, pants, dresses and a whole array of accessories. Needless to say, she never wore the same outfit twice and always had her pick of beautiful clothing. With her rapid growth and subtle daily changes, though, I was a bit relieved to not have to deal with the material side of growing off and leaving it to Rose and Alice.

Speeding into the forest, we bounded over the river, through the sunlit day.

As we rapidly approached the Cullen household, I heard heavy hearts thumping close behind us, approaching slowly. Though my defensive instincts quickly kicked in, I knew better than to turn on our pursuers. I winced slightly thinking of the earlier days when such a pursuit would have made me spin around, snarling at what turned out to be my best friend.

"Hey Jake!" I called behind me as we slowed our approach to the house. In the woods behind me, I could feel the air shift as Jacob Black's pack moved away from us and he phased back to his human form.

"Hey there Bells!" Jacob came out of the woods chuckling, wearing only a pair of jeans.

"Jake!" Renesmee rapidly changed direction and leapt in one long stride to jump into Jacob's waiting arms. Edward and I exchanged an exasperated glance as we looked at their close embrace. I knew that they had this supposedly mythical connection from Jacob's imprinting, but it didn't make it any easier to look into the eyes of my best friend, and know he would be love her passionately within a few years. Months at this rate. How could I expect to see my daughter that way when she had not even had her second birthday! It was also difficult to look at him, knowing what I was going to propose later today, knowing it would hurt him.

"Alright you two," I said. "Let's go up to the house and we can talk about the rest of the day." I smiled thinking, 'our family's house'.


	3. An Announcement

Before we could even get through the door, Alice bounded down the stairs.

"Good morning!" her voice practically sang out. "Carlisle, Esme, Emmett, Rose, they're here! And they've got something to tell us!" Edward rolled his eyes and smiled. Of course Alice knew of our plans. I glanced at him anxiously, but he put a calming arm around my shoulder, quietly assuring me that it would be ok.

As it was sunny out, Carlise was home from work, setting a perfect stage for our announcement. He and Esme joined the rest of the family already assembled in the large main room as Edward began to speak.

"We've decided that it is time for us to take some time to travel, away from the family." He looked at me encouragingly.

I continued, "I think that being this close to Charlie, especially with Renesmee's rapid growth rate, is too difficult. It seems to be upsetting to him to see her grow, but, to protect him, we can't tell him the reason why. Why should he have to deal with the confusion and problems?" I took a deep unnecessary breath, steeling myself for the next part. "Its also been very difficult to be around people who knew me when I was human. Even if they just see me in passing, they know something is different, something is wrong." I looked to Edward for help.

"Bella just needs time for the people with whom she was closest to move on to new parts of their lives. She is having difficulty seeing their reactions." He frowned slightly, always so sensitive to any pain facing me.

"Bella, you are doing so well though!" Esme broke in. I knew that our news would hit Esme the hardest. Mothering was part of her natural state. Without her children around her, she might never be fully happy, a fact which pained me since I was now one of her children.

"Still," Edward said, "it would be good for Nessie to learn that she is not the center of the universe, especially seeing how spoiled she is by family here." He smiled looking over at Renesmee being preened by Rosalie on one side, and Alice on the other while sitting on Esme's lap. She knew what was happening, of course. We had been discussing it with her over the last week, getting her excited about traveling while at the same time helping her understand that it would be an opportunity to learn away from the confines of the family.

"Don't worry though," he quickly amended, "we will come back soon. We wanted to go meet up with some of the friends we recently made. See their style of living."

"What about me?" Jake's voice boomed out behind us. "Is this going to be a little family departure?" He looked at me questioningly, "Bella?"

"Jake, let's talk about this later" I said gently, knowing he was not happy about the way our trip sounded.

"I think now would be a good time" he countered firmly.

"Do you want me to come?" Edward whispered quietly in my ear.

"No, let me do this alone." I replied, kissing him quickly before following Jacob outside.

I felt the anger, hurt and confusion radiating off of him as he paced into the woods. I didn't want to do this within hearing reach of my daughter though.

"Follow me, Jake" I said before sprinting off into the woods. He ran after me, not bothering to phase since he could run almost as fast. I slowed my pace to run alongside him, not stopping until we were well away from the house.

After stopping I turned to face him but he started talking before I could begin.

"What is this Bella? What's going on? Why did you keep this from me?" He fired off questions, hurt evident in his voice, anger splashed across his face.

"Jake, we decided that it was time we got out. It's too difficult for Renesmee to be confined to our company…and yours" I quickly finished as he looked ready to yell again. "We are going to travel. Not far, just across the US and maybe into South America to see some of our alliances. After all, Nessie has been wanting to see Zafrina since they first met when she was a baby." I guess I had finally gotten used to Renesmee's less-than-pleasant nickname and smiled again as I thought of her constant pleas to visit South America along with Zafrina's 'pretty pictures'.

"But Bella, you know how much it hurts me to be away from her. Why can't I come? I could travel along with you! I don't even have to phase. I'll just be part of the family!" he smiled, trying to be offhand. His desperation leaked through his casual words.

"I'm sorry, Jake, I really am. You know you're always my best man. But there is another reason that we wanted to take this trip now. Renesmee is not even two, Jake," desperation coming into my voice too, now. "But, even though she is so young, her maturation means that we can barely give her a childhood. Every decision we make impacts her 20 times more than if she were a regular child and she is anything but regular!" I paused, allowing myself to calm down and my breathing to slow as I considered my next words.

"Renesmee is reaching a point where she is aware of her own body. She is slowly becoming a woman and will very quickly learn of her wants and even…urges." I stopped, momentarily embarrassed about this conversation that I was far from ready to have. If I were human my cheeks would be flaming. But then, I reminded myself, if I were human, I wouldn't be having this conversation to begin with. In the long space of a second, though, my mothering instincts overcame my embarrassment.

"Jake," I started, calmly yet firmly, "Renesmee should not have to feel pressured into a relationship. I know that you are drawn to each other, that imprinting has meant that you are undeniably attached to her. She has to have a choice though. I want to be able to give her that much. Now I know what you are going to say," I kept on, since it looked like in about two seconds he was going to explode with denials that he wanted anything romantic with her. "I know that you want her to be ready and will keep being a best friend and older brother to her until that time. But I also know that you told me long ago that there was a choice. Though no girl has chosen another guy, she still has a choice. I don't want Renesmee to feel pressured into a decision before she is ready. I think…No…We both think, that she needs to learn more about life before she can choose someone to love. She can't feel tied down, Jake. So we are taking a vacation, traveling so she doesn't have to feel tied down. I _will_ allow her the ability to see what is out there and what is possible before she is committed to a match for the rest of her life and possibly, forever. I _will_ make sure she can have that, if nothing else." I finished fiercely.

Jacob seemed dumbstruck for a moment, processing my determination and my words. "But Bella," he said weakly, "what if she doesn't choose me?" I gazed back, pity and compassion overwhelming my intense emotions.

"I have to support whatever decision she makes, Jake." I said, feeling like I was betraying his friendship yet again. As if I hadn't caused him enough heartache for several lifetimes. "I hope that she does choose you, but, in order to do what is best for her, I have to allow her a choice." I ran to hug his suddenly defeated stance. "Don't worry!" I said quietly, "it's just a short trip. I know you'll be able to prove your love soon. You certainly did for me!" I broke away, smiling at the dim memory of his passionate kiss on top of a mountain.

"Yeah, and look what good it did me." He finished sadly, stirring the rest of the memory for me. The one where I left him to marry his mortal enemy. Ouch.

"I guess I understand, though." Jake tried to shrug off his sadness. "Nessie needs her own voice." A sudden push of hope came into his voice. "I will prove my love to her. I'll give her enough time to grow, then I'll be the one she is proud to love!"

"Thanks so much for understanding, Jake." I sighed, thankful that he accepted what Edward and I though was so essential. "I promise we'll be in touch all the time and call from wherever we go."

"You better!" He growled back, slinging an arm over my shoulder.

Laughing I slapped him on the back. "Come on, I'll race you back to the house!"

"Get ready to lose!" He eagerly said back, taking off into the woods with me on his heels.

This might just work out ok, I though, fervently hoping it was true.


	4. Preparations

**Hope everyone is enjoying so far! Don't worry, they'll be traveling soon. Forgot to say before, but obviously I don't own any of these characters, they are all the creation of Stephenie Meyer.**

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Our family understood that we had to go explore on our own for a while, becoming our own family, but that didn't stop them from making a few demands. With Renesmee's second birthday only three weeks away, there was no way that we were going to leave without giving her a proper birthday party, Alice informed us. Esme was satisfied that she would be able to have a big celebration and threw herself into planning with Rosalie and Alice. They wanted it to be a celebration for me as well, but though I was happy to celebrate my child, there was no way I was going to willingly sit through another event with attention focused on me. No amount of time was going to stop that. I still suspected Alice had something up her small, designer sleeve though, since I was in no way allowed to be part of the planning!

In the mean time, Edward and I drew Carlisle and Jasper into the planning of our trip. We had plenty of time to do that since Jacob just wanted to spend as much time with Renesmee as possible before we left.

All three of us decided that it was best to stay within the Americas. We did not want to attract unnecessary Volutri attention, which left the majority of Europe out. To meet Jacob's demands, we wouldn't go to any continent farther than South America, ensuring we would always be able to keep in contact with him and our family, should problems arise.

Edward suddenly became worried in the middle of planning, "Won't people ask why she isn't in school? She does look like she is of school age. What will we tell people?"

"Hmm," Carlisle thought. "Why don't you just tell people that it is a fall break of some sort. Or perhaps that your family is new to the area and you haven't been registered for school yet." He smiled sadly. "People will obviously not believe that you are Renesemee's parents, so you'll have to pretend that she is a sister, or a cousin if you like."

I stood and walked over to the window, gazing out at the forest as a stab of pain shot through where my heart used to beat. I knew that it would have to be that way. No one would believe that an 18-year-old girl could possibly have a 12-year-old daughter. It still hurt me that I could never recognize what a wonder she was and publicly take pride in her. My sadness must have read on my face, as Edward put a comforting arm around my shoulder.

"We'll know" he said softly, showing his unique ability to read my thoughts though mine were the only ones he couldn't know for sure. "We'll know that she is ours and that she is special."

"This is the only way" Carlisle added as Esme looked up at me with a look of sympathy.

I nodded stiffly and turned away. "It's the way it has to be." I choked out, clenching my jaw to hide my sadness. "Where next?"

At the end, we decided to be gone for just over six weeks. We would fly to visit Denali before driving back across Canada and the US, hitting the Midwest and Northeast during the cloudiest, rainiest fall to winter season. Then we would fly to Chile, and wander up the coast until we went into the Amazon and seek out the Amazonian women, Zafrina, Senna and Kachiri. Along the way there were other nomads with whom we could talk and develop ties. Though that wouldn't be our primary concern, we knew, better than any other vampires, the importance of having alliances in place.

In the mean time Edward thought my education was slightly lacking. With all the extra brain power I had, he felt it was a shame to waste time! Two days after talking with the family a huge box arrived on the doorstep of our little cottage. I looked skeptically at Edward who smirked crookedly at me. I tore through the wrappings to find books, and CDs, of every single South American language I had ever heard of, plus several I had never seen in my life and definitely couldn't pronounce.

"I didn't want to be the only one speaking while we were traveling," he explained innocently. I gaped at him in return.

"How am I _ever_ going to learn all of these?" I exclaimed. The only very dim memories I still have of learning language was years of Spanish lessons. Pretty much the only thing I remember from those was _Tengo que ir al baño_, I have to go to the bathroom.

Edward smiled wider at my dismay. "Don't worry! I'll help you, my love" he laughed.

And so we set to work. In the countless hours in our never-ending days, we studied together. Though I dreaded the experience, I could not have found a better teacher. Edward was always patient, creating endless sentences for me to memorize. I was surprised, though, how easy it was. I could read a book once and recite it back verbatim. In two days I could speak Spanish better than years of schooling. To help me out with my accents, the only thing that Edward said was not yet up to par, the whole family started conversing only in the languages we were learning. They had already learned these languages, of course.

Renesmee also took a part in my learning by becoming a fellow student. For a year and a half, Esme had devoted hours of time each day to Renesmee's schooling. Edward told me one evening that she had not only schooled all of her adopted children, she had been a school teacher for young children when she was human. Of course my daughter learned far faster than other children but Esme and Carlise researched to find appropriate materials for her reaching intellect, filling it with the classic school fare, math, science and history, while also adding some of their own interests, art, theatre and literature. Of course Emmett did his part by trying to engage our daughter in every sport that ever existed, and Alice and Rosalie taught her about fashion, make-up and all the 'girly' pursuits that I so abhorred. Nessie took to them with much more attention.

For our part, Edward and I took the time to do what we saw as the most important teaching. In the times when she wasn't running with Jacob, dressing with Alice and Rose, laughing with Jasper and Emmett, and studying with Esme and Carlisle, she had discussions with us. We wanted to instill in her the right sense of morality that we so valued from our parents, adoptive and not. We talked with her about philosophy and what we were. It was a constant struggle for her to find her own place in between two vastly different worlds. The biggest struggle was the need for secrecy that she knew was so important. A conversation when she was just over one year old resounded in my mind, making me fear for her future place in the world.

"But why mom?" she pushed, "why do you have to keep what you are a secret? You can run faster than a regular human, hear better, and you don't even _show_ anyone! I want to _show _people what I can do!" She pouted, an expression that normally got her whatever she wanted from her spoiling family.

"Because honey," Edward reasoned, "other people can't understand. They can't do what you do and get scared when they see something that's really different from themselves."

"But you met mom in school didn't you?" she asked.

"Yes, I did, and I'm so lucky that I did. But your mom was special." Edward looked lovingly at me and I smiled back, thinking of those first dreams and conversations when I confirmed all that Edward was. Nessie didn't seem to want to listen and so we had the same conversation many times, each to the same slightly unsatisfying end. I was worried, did she understand the importance of keeping our secret quiet? Of course she knew of the threat of the Volturi. No matter what, that threat had always been a real one, but besides the physical threat, I wasn't sure she understood why we had to be her little secret.

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The day of the party dawned bright and beautiful. Edward and I left Nessie sleeping in the cottage with Jacob as a careful guard outside in order to help set up decorations. Alice and Rosalie had, of course, spared no expense. To break the gloom of what Alice saw as a cloudy day, lights were hung on every tree surrounding the house. We helped her hang crystals from the ceilings so every surface sparkled. In addition there were hundreds of flowers covering every surface in beautiful arrangements. The theme was fashion, of course, now that Alice had finally found someone to dress up just like her!

In the morning, we woke her up to have some family time where Edward and I could give her our present. Our daughter loved reading and literature, a trait she gained from all her family. So, to encourage her own ideas, we bought her a small, portable computer that fit in her designer backpack so that she could record ideas anytime she wanted. Edward couldn't help himself and had stocked it with thousands of songs. I just wanted her to have internet access anywhere. I knew that she would miss Jake, her best friend too, after all, and so bought her an internet card that would allow her to email him anytime she wanted.

We invited Charlie and Sue to be part, along with Jake's pack. Each brought something special. We didn't specify an age, knowing it would alarm Charlie even more, so made it a going-away celebration as well. Renesmee received every traveling item she would ever need. On top of the backpack which Alice had picked out, she received beautiful seed pearl bracelet from Carlisle and Esme, a starter make-up kit from Rosalie, a set of DVDs from Jasper and Emmett which fit into our car for the drive and a suitcase full of travel clothing from Alice. Jacob gave her a necklace with a wood carving of a wolf howling at the moon. I recognized the enormous craftsmanship of it and gave Jake an extra squeeze. For a final gift, Edward had clearly conspired with Charlie and Sue, giving Renesmee, Edward and I tickets to a Broadway show for our time in New York.

After opening presents, cake and a feast (mostly eaten by the pack), it was time to say goodbye and accept well-wishes for our trip. It was bittersweet to say goodbye to them all, but comforting to know the great family we left behind. Besides, what bad things could happen in just six weeks?


	5. Rumors

**Again, I don't own any of these characters. Enjoy!**

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The scenery of Alberta, Canada flashed by as we left Banff National Park toward Calgary in the dwindling cloudy light. Renesmee dozed in the backseat of our car, a Cadillac Escalade Hybrid we got for the trip. I smiled to myself thinking of this 'little' parting gift from the whole family, and approved by Jacob. He wanted Renesmee to be comfortable for all the time in the car, but had to meet our pre-conditions. Edward wanted to drive fast, and I just wanted something where we wouldn't have to stop for gas every few hours. Plus, why not help the environment all that we could? We were the ones that would be facing the effects several hundred years from now!

Edward turned to me, smiling my favorite crooked smile, "It was nice to see the Denali family again. Looks like their family is growing too."

I smiled thinking of our visit. "It was good to see them," I frowned, a twinge of jealously entering my mind. "Though it seemed like Tanya still…thinks of you."

He chuckled quietly at my jealousy for a match he claims never to have interest in. "She has never meant anything to me other than a fellow sister. Though I was sad to see their continued grief for Irina." He glanced back at Renesmee. "She's tired out from trying to be a vampire all the time. We should stop soon and get a room so she can sleep properly."

I nodded my agreement. I had almost forgotten what it meant for excitement to tire me. We pulled the car off to the highway into a city. I was amused to look at the sign:

**Medicine Hat**

**Population: 60,000**

**"Canada's Sunniest City"**

I raised an eyebrow at Edward "Canada's 'sunniest city'? Are you sure this is a good idea?"

"Don't worry, I'll give Alice a call later to see the weather. If it doesn't look good, we'll just leave at dawn." He picked up my hand and kissed it gently "We'll be fine."

I was still on edge from the visit. It was wonderful to see Garrett with amber eyes, comfortable and happy with Kate and his new family, though he still had some difficulty with the 'vegetarian' diet. However, they had raised other concerns in my mind.

As Renesmee slept in another room a few nights ago, we sat around their dining room table, Carmen and Eleazar, Kate and Garrett, and Tanya, who sat closer to Edward than I felt comfortable.

"We have heard rumors," Carmen started. "Some nomads who have come through this part, interested in our way of life have told us of the rumblings in the vampire circles. They speak of your intention to overthrow the Volturi and establish a new order of life. Some seem interested, others angry."

"Carmen," Edward countered, "We never intended to directly challenge the Voluturi. If they hadn't threatened our child, we would still remain out of focus."

"Maybe, maybe not." Eleazar replied, glancing back at the bedroom where Renesmee slept soundly. "Your family has a great concentration of powers. You also have very strong allies in the wolves, as well as Carlisle's connections within the vampire world. This rising power in America cannot long be ignored by the Volturi. Though they might not have the power now, we have seen that they will not be stopped from protecting their 'rule' even without the façade of leadership, though it pains me to say it." Eleazar was still having difficulty thinking of the Volturi as the 'bad guys' since he was once one of them. In the mean time, my fears had risen exponentially though Edward downplayed the threat.

Ignorant to my train of thought, Edward interrupted my reverie, "we're here, love." I looked up to see a non-descript hotel. "I'll go check us into a room." He leaned over and kissed me gently before getting out of the car with practiced slowness, careful not to attract unnecessary attention. I sighed, pushing the memory from my head and got out to open the back door, gently waking Renesmee.

She was grumpy from her nap and not hungry since we hunted in the national park earlier in the day. We went straight up to the room, though it was still early. Renesemee, after quickly calling Jake to check-in that we were all ok, fell into bed, barely bothering to change clothing. Edward smiled at her sleeping form and took my hand, leading me out into the main room of our suite. I closed the door gently and turned to see him inches from my face. He took my face in his hands, kissing me softly.

"We'll face the rumors," he said. Evidently he had been paying more attention to me in the car than I thought. "I talked to Carlisle while you put Nessie to sleep. He was interested, but didn't seem overly worried. We're both sure that it is just a passing rumor that time will end. Alice has been looking into the decisions of the Voluturi and, aside from a recent acquisition, they haven't made any choice related to us."

"A recent acquisition?" Fear strained through my voice. Edward looked into my eyes, still able to dazzle me after two years of marriage.

"Stop being afraid that some catastrophic thing is about to happen!" He said with humor coloring his voice. "The Volturi normally make adjustments every few years. They might add another member if they find a vampire with a more potent power than members of their current guard, or if they want to try out someone's addition to the guard to see what they could contribute. It is the way the guard has become so strong over the past 1500 years!" He took me in his arms, as always a calming force.

"I'm just worried, Edward." I said weakly.

"I know," he replied. "But I can think of much better things to occupy your mind tonight than needless fears about the Volturi."

"Our daughter is in the other room!" I said through a clenched jaw.

"And soundly asleep" he replied solumly. "Dreaming of mountains and lakes, moose and grizzlies. And one very annoying wolf" he added, frowning.

"Come on, Jake has been very good. He's only run to check on us once!" I joked, surprised when he had suddenly appeared at the Denali coven's door after we had been gone only three days.

"I'm impressed actually" Edward responded. He hurried on as my eyebrow raised. Could Edward actually be coming to accept Jake's future role in our family? "I just mean that it seems like his connection to Nessie has become more attuned as we go further away. Like yesterday when she was sad yesterday that we had to leave the Denali coven. He called right away because he knew something was wrong. Its an interesting phenomenon to watch, how the imprinter reacts to his object being far away."

"Well I think he's doing a great job. I'm glad that we can at least take away the pressure from Renesmee for a little while" I replied. In the few weeks leading up to our trip, Edward had read that Renesmee's thoughts became more and more uncertain regarding Jake. He was a friend to be sure and she didn't have many of those, but was there something else she should be feeling? She kept wondering if she should see Jake the way that I explained my connection to Edward.

I sighed as Edward hugged me tighter. "Leave it for now, love" he urged me. "Renesmee is safe with us and a psychic looking out her. There are more pressing issues on my mind." He smirked, softly kissing my lips and then becoming more and more intense as we made our way to the couch.

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**For more details on what came next in Bella and Edward's night, go to my more 'mature' FanFiction "Burning Rain: The Addition", Chapter 2.  
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	6. Unexpected Visitors

Cuddling on the couch in a change of clothing, Edward and I prepared to wait out the night, listening to soft music Edward hooked up to the room sound system while I read off my Kindle. It was the birthday gift I hadn't wanted but enjoyed nonetheless. The family insisted, however, on celebrating what would have been my 20th birthday by giving me a Kindle, an electronic book reader that allowed me to carry thousands of books at my fingertips. Though I definitely preferred the feel of a book with pages in my hand, it was convenient for the long hours of car travel and the speed at which I read.

A quiet but shrill ring interrupted my reading. Edward's hand shot out to silence the phone, pulling it open.

"Edward? Are you, Bella and Renesmee alright?" Her voice would have been unintelligible for a human ear, but mine picked it up just fine.

"Yes, we're fine Alice. What's going on?" He replied, speaking softly. Worried, I rushed over and peeked in to find that Renesmee was still sleeping peacefully.

"I guess nothing. There was a pair of nomads in your area who changed their original direction and are coming toward you. It always makes things more difficult to see with Renesmee there but I think you are going to meet them" She explained hurriedly.

"We're going to meet them?" I hissed back.

"No, Bella." Alice replied to my question "Edward is going to meet them alone. It looks like it will be by some big teepee or something? Do you guys know where this place is?"

"Yes, Alice, it isn't too far from our hotel." Edward replied. We had passed it on our way into town. "Are they hostile?"

"No, I don't _think_ so" she said after a pause. "But I think one of them has a pretty significant power. Don't worry Bella" she answered my unspoken question. "I'm pretty sure they are just curious. Though be careful, Edward, they aren't… like us and might be hungry." I knew what she meant and it only made me more afriad. They didn't follow the 'vegetarian' lifestyle. I cringed to think it meant that death would occur in the same place as my daughter.

"One more thing, Edward," Alice inserted before he could hang up the phone. "Use the window. Otherwise the front desk woman will be…a barrier and you won't be able to leave on time."

"Thanks Alice" He smiled wryly and hung up the phone.

Knowing my voice would come out panicked, I pushed my shield aside to speak to Edward through my thoughts. After practicing for almost a year and a half I could keep it off with little effort or thought.

_Edward you have no idea of what they are like! _I mentally shouted at him as he pulled on a jacket and kissed me in preparation of leaving. _You don't know what their abilities will be, or if they are allied with the Volturi, and you won't even have my protective ability in case they mentally attack you!_ For his benefit I thought of ambushes, of crazed, red-eyed vampires pulling him apart, a thought which made my eyes prick.

He pulled me in close, speaking quietly to respond to my thoughts "Bella, love, I _need_ to go meet with them. If they are looking for us, I'd rather have them as far from Renesmee as possible. Plus there must be a reason they are seeking us out instead of just going to Carlisle and Esme."

_You'll be outnumbered! They could hurt you and I'd have no idea whether you need my help. I think I should come. _I shot back, pulling away from embrace.

He held me fast. "I'll know what their intentions are and if they are planning an attack. Plus, you know as well as I that we cannot leave Renesmee alone." He kissed me gently and then smiled his crooked smile. "I'll call your cell phone as soon as I speak with them." He kissed me again deeper as I pulled the shield back over me.

"I love you so much." I said softly. "I couldn't live if anything happened to you."

"As I love you. Don't worry, I will be back very soon, before you even have time to worry." Another quick kiss and a smile and he disappeared out the window.

* * *

For the next hour I sat in dreaded anticipation. I went to watch Renesmee's sleeping form, gently stroking her hair to calm my own nerves. After an hour that seemed longer than a whole day, my phone finally vibrated in my pocket. I practically sprinted into the next room and flipped open the phone.

"Edward? Are you alright?" I said anxiously.

"I'm fine, love" He replied soothingly. "I'm coming back now" The line went dead.

Less than a minute later he crept through the window and into my waiting arms as I hugged him close to me.

"I'm ok, my Bella, no need to worry" he crooned into my hair. I squeezed him tight to me before suddenly pushing back.

"What took so long? I was about to have a heart attack waiting here!" Figuratively, of course, I thought.

"Well, they are certainly interesting travelers. Travelers you are going to meet tomorrow, if you are ok with that…" he trailed off, looking deep into my eyes as I grew nervous again.

"Calm yourself, my love. They were just… curious" he frowned slightly "though they did give me plenty to think about."

"Tell me" I urged, wanting and yet dreading to know about these strangers and what they were doing in our life. He pulled me onto his lap on the couch before beginning.

"Well, Davide and Asita are unique to the vampires that I have met during my time. They first heard of us through Charles, Makenna's mate. Evidently Davide and Charles have the same creator, a vampire afraid of the Volturi due to a vendetta they exacted long ago. Though Charles respects the Volturi rule, it seems that Davide was a 'better student', avoiding the Volturi's attention by traveling through Africa after his creator was tracked down and killed by the Volturi. His 'gift' is his ability to sense power. He almost works like a tracker, but he can feel the power that both humans have the potential to give and that vampires can use. That was how he found Asita, who was human at the time. He fell in love with and then changed Asita, and the two have been together since. Asita's power is incredibly unique and also incredibly powerful. They have been attempting to avoid the Volturi, fearing that he would be 'collected'. Asita also despises authority figures, and so they have traveled everywhere but Europe, trying to stay away from the Volturi's eye."

"What is Asita's power?" I asked, afraid for the answer.

"During his life, Asita was a teacher in his tribe and could subtly develop the natural traits of his followers. When he became a vampire, he found he was able to help develop the powers of other vampires with whom he interacted. Davide's gift was developed by Asita who helped his mate sense the powers in vampires from far away, knowing when they were a threat and when they were not."

"You said 'his mate'" I remarked, my ears sensitive to every detail. "They are both men?

"Yes, that is the other interesting aspect" Edward remarked pensively. "I have never before seen two males as mates. I would think that the aggression would clash, causing one to destroy the other, as normally occurs when too many male vampires are in contact."

"Interesting" I replied, thinking over this last development. "But why us? And why are we meeting them?"

"Asita can choose whose gifts he develops, making him a very powerful ally and at the same time a very dangerous enemy. Their intentions are truly curious, not aggressive. Though they do drink human blood, they are also fascinated by the possibilities that Renesmee presents to the vampire world and the power that we hold as a family, standing up to the Volturi. After hearing Charles and Makenna's account of what happened two years ago, they decided to come seek us out and learn more about us. Davide knew what to sense and since we were closer, they sought us out before going to Forks."

"But are they going to be safe, Edward? For meeting Renesmee? Even if they don't want to hurt her, they might still be drawn by her blood." I responded, increasingly feeling that this meeting was a bad idea.

"I told them they needed hunt before meeting her, but asked that they go to Calgary so that questions would not be raised about us. I don't want them to hunt, obviously" he attempted to placate me as I frowned at him in disapproval "But I'd rather it be safe for Renesmee if they meet her today. And, frankly, I would be frightened of the repercussions for not meeting with them and the potential of them becoming enemies if we do not listen to what they have to say. Both of us had a great deal of thinking to do."

I shrank into him, tension present permeating every pore.

"I don't know Edward" I sighed. "What if something goes wrong? We need to talk to Carlisle and feel out the situation. And see if Alice has any feel for the situation. And…"

My voice had reached a fevered pitch. He kissed me to silence my talk.

"We'll do all of that and more to prepare. I am almost sure that they are just curious. If we do not want to be allies with them, we do not have to. Trust me, my love, I saw their thoughts and there was no plan for deception." He kissed me again deeply and hugged me tight to him. We sat that way for only a minute before I jumped up.

"Alright then" I said, my mind made up to be strong for my daughter's sake "Let's get started."


	7. Decisions

**Sorry I've been MIA recently! It was my birthday and so my writing was slightly interrupted with celebrations. I've written two new chapters so enjoy the development of the story. Review if you feel like it, I certainly appreciate it! I also decided to abandon my 'addition'. I didn't feel like it added too much but let me know if you think otherwise...  
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Edward called Carlisle immediately after he finished explaining the situation to me and repeated his experiences with the newcomers.

"I have heard of this couple before" he replied after hearing our explanations of the nomads. "Garrett met them several years ago while traveling with Makenna and Charles. He explained them within the context of the 'unknowns', vampires who did not necessarily appreciate Voltuiri rule but also did not know any alternative to keeping the peace in the vampire community."

"Does Alice see them as a threat to us if we meet them?" I asked hurriedly, grabbing the phone from Edward. More and more I became apprehensive about bringing Renesmee into meeting these nomads. Even if they had hunted, a concept that made me cringe to consider, how were we to know that they wouldn't just attack her after smelling her blood? I definitely was not willing to take that risk.

"I'm not sure, Bella" Alice said, trepidation in her voice. "Renesmee is making it difficult to see. They don't seem to have any plans to attack, but that does not mean that they won't act on instinct."

Panic set in as I considered her words. "Bella, don't worry" Alice continued "Edward will know immediately if they intend to attack. You have a mental shield that can block you, Edward and Renesmee from the one who seeks out talent." Her words did little to reassure though.

If it hadn't been for Jasper and Rosalie, I think we would have been driving in the opposite direction. As I handed the phone back, a million possible outcomes raged through my mind at the same time, each of them more worrisome than the last. Interrupting these bleak thoughts Edward handed the phone back to me.

"Jasper wants to talk to you" he said, pulling me in closer. "Either way, we'll be ok and we'll make sure nothing happens to her."

I took the phone, my smooth movements marred by the fear causing my hand to shake slightly.

"Bella," Jasper said soothingly "with the gifts that you and Edward have, you could take almost anyone in a fight. But I do not think it will come to that. Strategically, meeting them is an opportunity. The rumors that you heard in Denali have been echoed by Peter and Charlotte who came to visit while traveling through just after you left. They told us many think that a confrontation is looming with the Volturi and everyone must take sides. They can give us what we need if they are friends, protection and experienced skill." He paused, allowing me to comprehend the gravity and enormity of the looming situation.

"We wouldn't let you meet with them if we felt there was a serious threat to Renesmee" Rosalie's voice said in the background, her attachment to our child bursting in her voice. "We love her too, but know you can handle the situation."

I took a deep breath, listening to the thrumming beat of my child's heart in the background, calming and steady. Maybe they were right. Maybe meeting with these strangers would ensure her safety for the future.

"What do you think?" I softly asked Edward, looking up into his golden eyes.

Emotions flickered through his face as he thought about our options: confusion, fear, and a bit of what I thought could have been calculation of the possibilities an alliance could bring. He took almost ten seconds to reconcile his varying emotions.

"Why don't we ask her what she thinks?" he replied finally.

* * *

After Renesmee woke up, we waited for her to shower and change clothes before explaining the situation to her.

She took extra time with her appearance though Edward and I constantly reassured her that she was unbelievably beautiful. Her hair dry, makeup intact, she finally registered the worried expression on my face, and the tightly controlled expression on Edward's.

She had recently begun to speak more, not using her gift as often. When I worried to Edward, he reassured me that she was simply becoming embarrassed about all the physical contact. By reading her thoughts, he learned that she needed space and time to get used to her new emotions toward the people around her and get over her awkwardness. Having remembered my own awkwardness around both strangers and parents while I grew up from my dim human memories, I decided not to push her.

"What's going on?" she asked eyes flashing between us with faster than human speed.

"Nessie," Edward said slowly, picking out each word carefully "I met with some vampires last night who were interested in us…interested in you, especially. They were friends of Makenna and Charles, who know Garrett, and were curious about our family."

"So are they friends? If they are friends with Garrett then they like us, right?" Renesmee questioned.

"We don't know yet, love" I replied. "They heard about what happened with… the Volturi." I winced as I saw a dark cloud pass over her face, knowing the fear that she held for these nightmares of her recent childhood.

"But they are not part of the Volturi" I quickly comforted her. "They just want to know more about us. They want to know more about you because of how special you are, how unique you are to our world."

"Nessie, these could be very good friends" Edward explained. "They could help us make sure that the Volturi to not threaten us. Still, we don't want you to be in any danger and so we'll take every precaution. But they are not like our family or like the Denali coven. They do hunt humans."

"It's your choice though, my darling" I felt the need to explain that she did not have to put herself in danger for the strategic advantage. "If you do not want to meet them, you don't have to."

She thought for a few seconds before her face set. "If they can help us, then we should meet with them. I don't think they'll be bad." she said determinedly, her face set.

"Are you sure? You don't have to do anything you don't want to, especially if you feel nervous about it" I said, determined to protect my child, even if she did not feel the need to be protected. I already felt helpless in this situation, never knowing exactly what was going to happen.

"No, I'll be fine" she replied, her jaw set with resolve. Her determination to help her family at whatever cost, even sacrificing her own safety, was something I both loved about my child, and caused me to fear for her future.

Edward smiled a crooked smile and mumbled to himself "Just like her mother…"

I knew that we would need to have our full strength, should this come to a fight. So, we took a quick driving trip to a nearby Interprovincial Park and hunted cougar. Renesmee also dealt with a frantic call from Jacob. He had evidently sensed her shock of fear when hearing about the Volturi and was about to start running to meet us. As Renesmee got more and more frustrated on the phone, trying to explain why it was important that she meet with the nomads, I finally stepped in.

"Jacob, we gave Renesmee the choice and told her all about the options. It is up to her to decide what she can and cannot handle" I said firmly.

"Bella, this could be dangerous!" he practically shouted back. "What are you _thinking_ putting her into such an obviously scary situation where she could get hurt? There aren't even enough people to protect her if something happened!" He paused, fear cracking his voice when he spoke again. "Bells, I don't know what I'd do if something happened to her."

"Jake, you have to trust us." I said, hoping he would understand the potential advantages of the situation and that I was nervous too. "We would never put her in danger. Edward will know their intentions and I'll protect her with my shield. You know that I'd give anything to make sure she's safe."

"Ok Bella," he sighed, resigned to the fact that we were going to let her make her own decisions, no matter what that meant. "But you better call me as soon as its over!"

I assured him that we would as we pulled into the overcast day at Medicine Hat, waiting for the strangers to emerge from the nearby woods.


	8. A Revelation

It was only minutes of waiting until I heard their rapid progress through the woods. I quickly expanded my shield to cover all three of us as Edward concentrated on sifting through their thoughts, mumbling to me to assure me that they were peaceful, only thinking of their curiosity about Renesmee and me. They slowed their approach as they finally came through, walking just faster than human speed before stopping 20 yards away.

My wary eyes flashed between their faces, studying for any aggressive moves while testing my shield to make sure nothing pressured against it. Davide was tall with defined French features set in an expression of avid interest, his vivid red eyes fixed on Renesmee. His height was nothing to Asita, however. He looked almost seven feet tall, with black skin that almost gleamed purple. His strong, lean body reminded me vaguely of the Amazon women in its fluidity and primitiveness, though his clothing was modern. His bright red eyes were set deep in his face, looking down at the three of us with calculation, curiosity and what I thought might be a touch of contempt.

"Welcome Davide, Asita" Edward said, nodding at each. I noticed his subtle hint to me as he reached out to these nomads. Though at first glance it appeared that Asita's physical presence made him the leader of this team, his acknowledgement of Davide first showed me that it was actually his smaller mate who led the duo.

"Nice to see you again Edward" Davide purred in a smooth French accent. "Please will you introduce me to your mate and child?" He smiled at us, intelligence and awareness bring in his eyes.

"This is my wife, Bella, and our daughter Renesmee" Edward explained, his eyes only briefly leaving Davide's face as he concentrated on the thoughts of both.

"A pleasure Bella, Renesmee" Davide said smoothly. "It is truly incredible to see the effect of your gift, Bella. As I am sure Edward told you, I have the ability to find those with power, and avoid others if I wish. Rarely do I have difficulty finding those gifts I seek out. You seem to block that though, and are currently blocking your mate and daughter as well. Truly fascinating."

His speech was fluid, filled with curiosity about our familial situation. His words did help me relax, though, along with the fact that Edward seemed at ease. To me this signaled that their thoughts were not hostile or offensive.

"Nice to meet you Davide, and you Asita." I said formally.

"What brings you to this area of the world?" Edward inquired politely, already aware of the answer, but attempting to keep the friendly attitude intact. It seemed like he was trying to draw them out.

This time, I was surprised by Asita's deep bass voice though he only said one quick word.

"Travel."

The silence between us lengthened as I saw Edward wondering what to ask next while still staying polite. I was just frustrated. My words burst from me.

"Please excuse me if it's rude, but why are you interested in us? Clearly you are both very talented, Edward has told me of your gifts. Why are you here?" I was sick of formality and too new at both being a mother and a vampire to control my emotions toward my child. I just wanted the truth.

Davide started laughing lightly and Asita's face twisted into a smile.

"So in control and yet still such a newborn!" Davide laughed. "Don't worry child, we do not want to harm you or come to spy on you. Though your child is interesting, she does not tempt our thirst, only our curiousity." I glanced at Edward and he nodded quickly to show they were telling the truth.

"Are you really so surprised that we came to see you?" Davide continued. "As we told Edward, we do not approve of the Volturi's methods. Though we understand the rules they uphold, they have tried to 'collect' us for over a century, when Asita joined me in this life. They pursued us, destroying my creator in pursuit of my talent, even before they knew of Asita's existence. When another nomad found out Asita's power, we fled. They want our power with them, but since we refused to join, they deemed our connection 'unnatural'. The fact that two men loved each other, bonded together was seen as an abbhorance to be untolerated, similar to their perspective on a half-human, half-vampire child, no? Asita?" He looked to his mate to continue the story. I was reeling from their description of Renesemee. An 'abhorrance'? Who could ever say such a thing about someone so innocent? Asita's voice interrupted my rising anger.

"As we traveled, we met with more nomads who told us of the destruction of covens who had disobeyed the Volturi's _law_" his deep voice thundered, sneering contempt at the word 'law'. "They do not want peace. They want power. I do not believe in being _inferior_ to those who think themselves above me." He stopped, a sour expression on his face.

"This is why we were drawn to you, precisely" Davide finished.

"What you mean _this_?" Renesemee's voice cropped up, curiosity written all over her face.

"This, young one, is the family your parents have created. You three are incredible examples of a new way of life. Your…interesting… eating habits seem to have allowed more than just co-habitation. You love passionately but it is a passion not just for your mate. We heard of the many who came to your aid when challenged unjustly by the Volturi. You represent a new power, a rising power, perhaps. One that stands against a highly corrupted force."

"You are mistaken in that. We do not seek confrontation. We do not intend to stand against the Volturi if we can avoid it" Edward insisted.

"You will have no choice" Davide said simply. "You and your loved ones lived to tell the story of a time when the Volturi were not as powerful as they thought. Now that you showed another way of life, a way of life perhaps better than the one the Volturi champion, others will challenge. It will not be long before an uprising occurs in the vampire world. What form it will take is largely up to you."

"Why is it up to us?" I asked, anger spurring my speech though I dreaded the answer.

"Because no matter the form, you must be destroyed if the Volturi wish to maintain power" Davide explained. "You represent the beginning of their end. They will use you to show that they still have the ability to rule and suppress those that go against them."

"This time, however" Asita interrupted, a growl in his words "they will not be able to say that they are doing it for the better good of the vampire world. They must admit that their sole goal is power."

Silence crept back as we digested these words. As I thought about the implications of Davide and Asita's interpretation of the actions, I came to see that it must be true. If they wanted to stay in power, they would need to take out the original threat. Us.

As my mind continued to process, a new thought came into my head. If they knew that we would have support again, they would need something new, more power to try to defeat us. I balked in horror as the words tumbled from my lips.

"They are forming an army?" I gasped and heard Edward suck in breath beside me.

"I believe so. I have sensed movement of power all over Europe, causing us to seek your family out to understand what your intentions were" Davide explained, his eyes trying to read us.

"You see" Asita broke in. "You must fight or perish. We come to fight with you in the hope of an end to their domination."

I turned to Edward, fear written across my face and saw the same fear echoed in his. I remembered the words said less than two years ago by Edward. _I'm sure they'll recover from the blow someday. And then . . .I imagine they'll try to pick us off separately._ Was this the beginning of the end for our peace?

"Mom?" Renesmee said quietly, interrupting my rapid processing of all the terrible things that could happen, the friends that could die if we did not act quickly enough. "Is this because of me?"

In a second Edward and I sped to hug her to us. "Of course not, love. We will make sure that nothing happens to you. It is not because of you that they are doing this, it is because we have found a way to be happy that they do not understand" Edward insisted.

"They might seek her though" Asita said, warning in his voice. "Even if you did not ask for this, she has talent." He started walking toward us and we instantly tensed into a protective formation with Renesmee behind us. He paused "If I may?"

Edward nodded slightly at me and so I very reluctantly stepped aside, allowing my shield to continue to cover her.

"Bella, it's ok" Edward said quietly.

"Mom, please?" Renesmee said quietly, trustingly stepping forward even as I wished to pull her back. I slowly pulled my shield back until I could no longer feel it protecting her. Renesmee nervously put a hand up as Asita drew closer, towering over her slight figure. They touched hands and he sucked in breath as she showed him an image.

"She's showing him our family" Edward said to me, reading her thoughts as they passed to him.

"Such talent!" He said as she broke contact. "You have much potential, child. You will be able to not only put images into people's minds through touch, but also just by your mind. You will show them not only memory, but also anything you wish them to see."

"Incredible" Davide breathed from several yards back.

"We must return to our family" I said, partly to Edward and partly to the nomads. "They need to hear this."

He nodded his agreement to me and turned to the nomads, those who wished to be allies.

"We invite you to our family to discuss these events. As you know, we do not hunt humans, and so ask you to refrain near our house. We will travel by car and meet you there in a few days." Asita withdrew to stand near Davide and both nodded.

"We are honored" Davide said. "We hope to soon work with you toward our common goal."

With that, they turned and ran into the forest behind. I stared into Edward's amber eyes, reading all the emotion I myself felt: fear, confusion, doubt, determination. All mixed into our love for each other, our family and, of course, our daughter. I pulled her into a tight hug.

"I'm sorry Nessie," I said quietly, trying to convey more than I could express in words. How could I have brought her into such a life of fear and doubt?

"We will make it right" Edward said firmly before we ran back to the car and moved toward home.


	9. Growth

**Another chapter! I know that some people object to introducing new characters into a story apart from Meyer's canon characters. However, there is a huge vampire world out there that is unexplored. If a war is indeed brewing, they are going to want to pick a side or stay out of the way. Enjoy!**

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I sat on the gleaming white couch, tapping my foot impatiently on the floor as words swirled around me and my mind sifted through options. The velvet black night wrapped itself around the house, only causing the interior to glow more brightly and its inhabitants to look otherworldly. We had gotten home less than an hour ago and yet the whole family was already in an uproar.

Esme wrung her hands at the door, her straining, nervous eyes darting between Carlisle's pacing form, Edward's marble stance just behind me, and Rosalie's irate expression as she screamed at Edward. Emmett stood slightly behind Rose, his eyes narrowed as he attempted to calm his mate, while Jacob stood slightly away, his angry expression also fixed on Edward. They couldn't understand why we had invited these strangers into our midst when it constituted danger for the community and Renesmee. Alice and Jasper stood at the window. It was clear Jasper was trying to concentrate on lowering the high emotions in the room with closed eyes, while Alice's frustration was written all over her face as she repeatedly mumbled "Why can't I see it? Why can't I see them?"

"Enough Rosalie!" Carlisle said firmly, interrupting her tirade. "Edward and Bella are dealing with this the best they can. They do not need you to criticize their parenting or responsibility regarding their child."

"But Carlisle," Rosalie hissed "we don't know anything about these nomads besides what Edward has told us. All we know is what they said about the rising Volturi threat and the building of an army. How do we even know they are telling the truth?"

"Are you _questioning_ my ability to read their intentions? Are you _implying_ that I cannot protect or know what is best for my own daughter?" Edward hissed back, his furious amber eyes burning into Rosalie. She made a quick move toward Edward but was restrained by Emmett who locked his arms around her in what appeared to be both an embrace and a restraint.

"No one is questioning you, Edward" Carlisle said soothingly. "We just need to figure out the best course of action as regards these strangers. Alice, how long do we have?"

He turned to Alice as she stared out the windows. "They will be here by noon today" she replied, her voice strained and frustrated. "But I still don't see the Volturi deciding to build an army right now, like they said. I just can't _see_!" She threw her hands up.

As soon as we called after meeting with the nomads, she looked into the futures of all the Volturi guard and sensed a building of forces centered around one form that was a blank in Alice's eye. I could tell it shook Alice that she did not see this move coming nor could tell the exact form a future attack might take.

"Alice" Esme said quietly. "No one is blaming you for not seeing it. We do not rely on your gift to be omniscient and you should not expect it to be."

No response came as Alice kept staring out the window as though expecting her vision to come from the dark of the forest. Not seeing what she was looking for, she spun and stalked out of the room with Jasper close behind.

"Regardless, we need to be prepared" Carlisle broke through the silence. "Though they seem friendly, we will insist on a certain demeanor during their stay. They present a new opportunity for alliances and will be welcomed if their intent is indeed good."

"I won't let them be close to here, Carlisle" Jacob growled back. "It isn't just dangerous for Nessie. What about the people in Forks? Charlie? Are you going to allow them to hunt in this area?" Jacob appealed to me. While we meeting with Davide and Asita, Jacob had felt Renesmee's fear of the Volturi. While he was thrilled the trip was cut short, he quickly became apprehensive about the idea of more 'blood-suckers' coming into the region, especially ones we knew so little about.

"No, Jacob" I replied, breaking my silence for the first time that evening. "We've told them that they are not allowed to hunt in our territory, and they will respect that." A sense of authority had taken hold of me. During the course of the conversation I realized that I felt a power building in me, a self-assurance that helped me see all the options and determine the best one.

"Tomorrow during the day you will take Rensemee into town or to La Push. Give her space, though, to let her think about this herself. We will meet them as planned."

I saw Edward glance at me with surprise on his face as Jacob's expression lightened. I knew that I wouldn't be challenged though. I spoke knowing my words were the correct decision with a new confidence to take control of the situation.

My tone of finality ended the conversation. Rosalie glared once more at Edward before flipping her hair, spinning around and running out the door, Emmett hot on her heels. Jacob nodded slightly, his face still tense with fear before he made to go up the stairs to where Renesmee slept.

"No, Jacob" I said firmly. "Go talk to Sam about the situation and let him know that we will be having visitors. Let her sleep" I begged softly.

Though he glared at me, I stared back at him, not willing to change my position. Finally he spun around and loped out the door before phasing.

Those left in the room looked at me with surprise as I walked over to the window, taking Alice's place looking out. After a pause, Edward and Carlisle threw themselves into a rapid discussion of strategic moves. Jasper slipped in from the other room to join the discussion as Esme walked to the kitchen and started talking quietly to Alice.

The rest of the night passed quickly this way. In the mean time my mind spun with confusion over this new authority while I thought over the different options Edward, Carlisle and Jasper suggested. Why did I openly question Jake like that? It confused and upset me, putting a frown on my face as I watched the velvet black lighten to coal and then heather gray as the night flew by.

At some point Edward came to stand next to me, making me feel more secure and in control, though the same self-doubt whirled in my mind.

As the dawn arrived, Jacob returned and waited around pacing the room until Renesmee woke. She came downstairs after showering and, after we explained what was happened, readily agreed to go in town rather than relive the memories that arose from the meeting with the strangers. Alice walked lightly in to the room.

"Almost here!" She trilled. She seemed in a much happier mood, whether due to Jasper's influences or from her ability to see the near future quite clearly. She was sure the meeting would go fine.

"I'd give it an 85% chance that they will be allies at the end of the meeting" she smiled. "Here they come!"

Following Edward and my scents, Davide and Asita made their entrance through the woods to our house very slowly.

"Davide has sensed the power of our family. They are proceeding slowly out of caution." Edward said quietly, not wanting us to fear their hesitance. Edward, Carlisle and I went out to meet them.

"Welcome again Davide and Asita" I said loudly out into the woods where I knew them to be. My knowledge of their ways and voice of authority came out readily as I stepped in front of Edward and Carlisle.

"Thank you for your invitation, dear Bella" Davide replied, emerging from the woods smiling at us.

"We are curious as to the options presented to us and never turn down an offer of friendship, if it is sincere" I said smoothly. "Please let me introduce my father-in-law, Carlisle Cullen."

We quickly skipped through formalities as I invited them in and introduced them to the rest of the family. They told their story and I then described the options presented to us when suddenly I caught a quick glance pass between the mates.

"What? How could that be? It doesn't seem connected!" Edward's voice burst out in response to an unspoken statement. I looked at him in confusion as Asita nodded.

"I'm sorry," Edward said to the pair before turning to look at me with amazement and a touch of pride. "I am astonished though."

"Will someone please explain?" I demanded, frustrated at the interruption of our discussion.

"Please explain," Davide said. "I feel as if you can do it better than I anyway!"

"It seems that in the short time that we were with these two before, and the time we have spent with them today, Asita tested to see if he could influence and expand the power of those in the room. He believes that your gift has the ability to develop into some sort of natural leadership, almost as if the protection of your shield gave you the natural authority in the group" He smiled at me in wonder. "They think that your actions in speaking for the group have illustrated the development of this gift."

"That's not possible! I am not a leader at all! I'm just concerned as to how this pertains to my child!" I retorted, scoffing at the idea that 'natural leadership' could even be a gift. My mind turned over the thought even as a protested. Was such a thing possible? I knew that Siobhan seemed to possess natural leadership abilities in her coven, so it could exist. But how could I be a leader? I'd always blended into the background in both my human and the start of my vampire life.

"It is a natural development" Asita's deep bass voice explained. "You are bound to become a leader wherever you are. I just helped speed up the process." He smiled at me.

"You see, my theory is that all gifts have an offensive and defensive component" he continued on quickly when I and others showed signs of interrupting. "In all nature there are opposites. Light and dark, sun and moon, predator and prey. In our kind, I have found that even if one aspect of the gift is very slight, there is always the potential for a gift to be both offensive and defensive. Edward's, for example is both" he inclined his head slightly at my husband. "It seems that the counterpart to your shield is an aspect of leadership. Your shield protects those around you by you sharing your gift with others, bringing them under your power. But by protecting those around you, you have an influence on others, an authority that is superior in many ways to their own. This also presents a great advantage to you, one of the reasons we would so like to be on your 'side' so to speak when you fight the Volturi. In a fight, leadership is of key importance and you show the strongest signs of that leadership."

I stood speechless for a moment. As his words sunk in I was hit not only of the meaning of the words, but also of their truth. It felt right to me that all things have their opposites. Though I had never felt so before, it now made sense to me that I should lead, that I should determine what was right. I had no idea from where this emotion came, but it struck me that I wanted to protect those around me in the best way I could. If that meant sacrificing myself or creating common consensus, that it what it must be. I steeled myself then nodded slowly once, feeling at my core that my life was about to change.


	10. Identity

As the sun grew lower in the sky, Davide and Asita left to hunt as well as give us time to come to term with the power that both nomads could give us and the next course of action. Everyone seemed to have a different reaction to their presence, though most were hopeful about the advantages they might bring. Carlisle and Esme were both thrilled to have found friends willing to work with our family, and Carlisle especially was itching to hear more about Asita's philosophy of opposites. Alice was optimistic, as she saw a time when they would stand with us as allies though acknowledged there was a slight possibility of betrayal, a possibility which put Jasper on edge. Rosalie frowned on the alliance due to danger it represented, though Edward whispered to me that she couldn't completely quash her curiosity about expansion of gifts, her beauty seeming a weak gift in comparison to all that had been revealed about me today.

I was still confused. I knew, as Asita spoke, that I needed to be at the head of decision making and knew that others were more able to accept my decisions than those of other family members. This position of authority was never one I had asked for, though. It both terrified and thrilled me in its possibilities.

As afternoon shifted to evening we all agreed that something was developing with the Volturi that probably would badly impact us. Alice was the strongest voice saying that their plan definitely involved holding on to power, something none of us doubted. We could answer why and we could guess at how. The question we couldn't answer was why now? Esme pointed out that they hadn't attempted to kill us up until now. What changed their mind? For all Alice's gift, though, she still could not tell why they decided it for now as the whole future was vague. She thought it mainly had to do with outside factors influencing these decisions, causing Carlisle and Esme to hope that confrontation could be avoided.

I did not believe so, however. Though it seemed too soon to expect an attack, it was also too late to rule one out. I suggested that we contact our friends, especially the ones in Europe, to understand better the movement of the Volturi. If they confirmed what we had heard from Asita and Davide, we would need to start gathering friends fast.

Quickly preparations began for contacting our friends and allies. In the midst of these preparations, Jacob came back. His face instantly alerted me to the fact that something was wrong.

"Jacob? Renesmee?" were the only word I could stammer out while staring at his stricken face. Edward was beside me and holding my hand in an instant, while the whole room went silent to hear news.

"She's fine" Jacob said. "At least, she's pretty angry and upset but nothing bad happened to her." He looked sad and upset about something.

"You did _WHAT?!_" Edward yelled in response to Jacob's thoughts, a growl rising to his lips as Jacob flinched.

"I didn't know what else to do!" Jake pleaded back. "She was so upset that I had to act!"

"What Edward?" I said, quietly pleading for it to be something small and not the horrors I had imagined in a split second.

Edward turned away from Jacob in disgust. "They went into town and some girls made fun of Renesmee. Telling her she looked strange…"

"They said she was a freak!" Jacob interrupted.

"And laughed at the fact that Jacob was with her" Edward continued furiously. "And Jacob, unable to hold his temper when he sensed her embarrassment decided to act."

"Jacob, what did you do?" I gasped, all possible scenarios flashing through my head, some of them feeling deserved for making my child upset.

"I just…scared them a little" Jacob said sheepishly.

"What did you _do_, dog?" Rosalie said through gritted teeth, angry once again but now on my side of the story.

"I just yelled at them for being insensitive and such jerks to her!" Jacob insisted. "Wouldn't you have, Bella, if you were there?"

"That's not all you did!" Edward yelled back. "He not only terrified them, he actually _growled_ at them! Evidently they practically ran away screaming."

"Jacob, how could you?" I asked searchingly. "You know what would happen if people know what you really are! Think of what could happen to us! People know that we're still friends!"

"Bella, how could I not! Nessie was so upset and that was the only thing I could think of to make it right!" Jacob retorted, his eyes demanding that I understand.

"But you didn't think about what was best for Nessie, did you?" I hissed back. "Though she is only two years old, her body and emotions are that of a 15-year-old! She needs to learn to fight her own battles. It didn't help that these girls seemed like peers making fun of her with you 'coming to her rescue'" I scoffed. "She is a just a girl who needs time to develop emotionally!"

"She is so much more special than 'just a girl'" Jacob said angrily.

"Yes, I agree!" I responded. "But she has the same emotions. Emotions you clearly don't understand." With that I ran out into the woods to search for my daughter. I heard Edward yell a few more choice phrases at Jacob before running after me. I was suddenly caught up in my thoughts of my daughter though and remorse at yelling at Jake. Of course he didn't realize what it must have felt like to be Renesmee. He acted protectively without thought for what she needed for herself. But I knew what it felt like to be unusual. I hadn't been a human girl so long ago. I knew what it was like to have no friends, to feel as if I were invisible and wished to remain that way. I had found a place, though, a place in Forks. I had found friends in my human set, Angela Weber and Jessica Stanley, kind of. I couldn't find my daughter a place in this world, however, or keep her from feeling the sting of being different. I let out a dry sob in my sprint.

"Bella? What's wrong love?" Edward said in panic, long since running at my side. I continued to sob dryly.

"My love, please let me know what's wrong? I can't read your thoughts though I've been wanting to all day!" The fear in Edward's voice kept rising, higher and higher.

"Why can't I protect her?" I sobbed, throwing myself into his arms. "I know what it's like to be different, Edward. Why can't I give her a normal life?"

"She's not normal, love" he said quietly back. "She's so much more than that."

"I know what it felt like, Edward." I moaned. "To see the world passing without really being part of it. How can we find her a place where she truly belongs when she is not really of our world, and not really part of theirs?" I remembered looking down at my daughter as a baby. She was upset that her skin did not sparkle like mine in the sun, that she did not have my strength. But she would always be more beautiful than her peers, always have different tastes, never be quite the same. I couldn't protect her from that.

"We need to show her how unique and special she is" He said soothingly back. "She can fit in both, not neither. We'll be there for her. We'll figure it out"

He held me while I quieted, kissing me gently when I had stopped sobbing. No release came from my cries, and after a few minutes my desire for him quickly shifted to an obsession about finding my daughter. I needed to make sure she was alright.

Hand in hand, Edward and I raced through the woods, following her distinctive scent that had passed right by the Cullen house and into the woods. We followed it past our little cottage and deeper, heading East into the thicker trees. I smelled game all around us, tempted by a mountain lion only a few hundred yards away by the subdued fire in my throat, but I knew that Renesmee was most important now. I heard her as we approached, her scent getting stronger until we finally were walking at a human pace, coming to a tree where she was perched.

"Oh Renesmee" I breathed. "We were so worried!"

"I'm fine, mom" She said, the words coming out in short, clipped tones. "I just wanted to be _alone_. Clearly _that_ didn't work" she finished, mumbling under her breath.

"Do you want to talk about it?" I urged gently. "We're here if you need us."

"No" was her curt reply.

I sighed and looked at Edward who stared back in confusion. He didn't know how to handle the situation any better than I did.

"Can I come up?" I asked quietly, not wanting to push her too much. She shrugged in response. I mouthed _Give us a moment?_ to Edward. He kissed me gently before melting back into the woods. In a light jump I made my way through the branches to the high one on which my daughter sat, putting myself right next to her as we sat in silence.

After a few moments, I felt her body shake and realized she had started to cry, real tears running down her cheeks as her shoulders shook. I put my arm around her as she laid her head on my shoulder.

"Tell me about it, my darling" I said quietly. "I might not be able to help, but I also might be able. Try me."

She looked up at me with her deep brown eyes, my eyes, and sighing, put her head down before touching her palm to my hand. Instantly images filled my vision, as always perfectly transparent but also perfectly clear.

She played for me the scene in the shop with all the emotions she felt. Her excitement about going out and feeling normal was palpable. She quickly spotted other girls in the store, 15 or 16 year-olds, giggling while trying on and comparing sunglasses and wished that she could be part of that circle. She was shy as she walked close to them with Jacob shadowing her. All of the sudden they spotted her and started pointing at her while giggling and whispering to each other, words that were perfectly audible to her excellent hearing.

"Who is _that_?" "Who is that _with_ her?" "Is that her _bodyguard_?" "Look at her skin! So weird and white!" "And waist-length hair? So _weird!"_ They laughed to each other while Renesmee felt embarrassed, a little angry and completely rejected. A question echoed in her mind. _Why can't I be like them? Why do I have to be different?_ She was embarrassed to have Jacob's massive hulking form right beside her and angry at herself that she was so different. All of a sudden, Jacob came into view, walking swiftly over to the girls and started to explain to the girls that they were being insensitive and talking about how special Renesmee was. As they giggled in response, making fun of the use of 'special' to describe my daughter, I felt Renesmee's embarrassment and anger mount. When he realized that they weren't taking him seriously, Jacob started to yell at them, frightening them as he finally finished with a low growl. The silly girls looked petrified as they ran away quickly, glancing fearfully back at Jacob and Renesmee. She still caught their parting words though. As they turned to leave, one said to the other "What a _freak_!"

Renesmee's hand broke off contact as the memory faded away. I felt her sadness as she considered what she had just shown me.

"I'm so sorry, Nessie. People might not understand at this point, but you can help them to" I explained, giving her a long hug. "Some people are just mean, though."

"I just need some time, mom" she replied, looking down sadly.

"Alright, but come home soon ok? And don't scare us like that again, we were worried! 10 minutes?" I urged.

"Give me a half-hour" she replied, jumping lightly off the branch.

"20" I said firmly. She shrugged her shoulders before turning back. "And mom?"

"Yeah?"

"Would you mind shielding me from dad for a little while? I'd just like some privacy"

"Sure, if that's what you really want" I replied, understanding where Edward's gift could seem a little intrusive. "I'll talk to him about it."

She smiled sadly and walked into the forest as I turned toward where Edward was waiting. I explained her request as we slipped back through the woods to our cottage.

"I wish I could do more" I said. "I feel so helpless."

"You're doing all you can" he replied gently, agreeing that my shield might provide a solution. "She needs alone time and privacy. We can give that to her. And the rest of the time we'll just give her our love."

I nodded sadly. "We will protect her. We have to" I said, hugging tightly to my beautiful husband.


	11. Compromise

We gave Renesmee the time she requested, and I shielded her thoughts from Edward when she came back. Life seemed to go on, though I was constantly anxious for her wellbeing. As she slept that night, I left my sleeping daughter with Edward to go talk with Esme to try to assuage some of my fears. She assured me that every child went through a period where they needed independence. Still, I was uneasy as I headed back to my husband's embrace. Was our daughter growing away from us?

The next morning, life began again at high speed. I was determined to keep life as normal as possible for Renesmee and started her lessons with Esme over again. My eager daughter was more than willing to start as soon as possible, but she did have a few demands.

"I want to start fighting lessons with Jasper. And I want to work with Asita to expand my abilities"

Shock must have read all over mine and Edward's face as she quickly qualified her reasoning. "I just think that if I'm going to be in danger, I should know how to fight!"

"You won't be in any danger, love" Edward insisted.

"Do you know that for sure?" Renesmee insisted. I silenced him by putting my hand up as he instinctively began to reassure her. We didn't know that she wasn't in danger. We didn't know that she wouldn't have to fight. I sighed.

"Alright, Nessie. If that's what you want" I said in resignation. "But we aren't going to let you be alone with either of them. And, I think that Edward should be allowed to hear your thoughts while you work with both of them. You are still half-human."

"Mom! I need to have my _privacy_!" She screamed back. "Why can't you _trust_ me?!" She spun out of the cottage, leaving me weak with regret and about to go running after her to beg forgiveness. Edward's gentle touch paused me.

"You need to stay strong, love" he said gently.

"I know. You're right" I sighed, though I felt the pain where my heart used to beat. "I know she needs rules, but how can I refuse something that I asked for not so long ago? I needed to learn to fight and protect myself and my family and she wants the same thing." Edward winced at the reminder of my combat lessons before our confrontation with the Volturi just two years ago. It frightened me to think that this time I would undoubtedly need the skills.

"I'll train with her. We both can" I suggested to Edward, quickly continuing as he started to interrupt. "If she's anything as stubborn as you, she won't back down."

Edward smirked. "I think the stubbornness comes from your side, thank you. Come on, let's go find her."

We quickly found her scent and followed her train to her. She was sitting dejectedly, high up in a tree. Edward soothed her while I negotiated to find a common ground. We finally agreed that she would do lessons that we would attend and perhaps participate in. I agreed to shield her mind on the condition that she came to us if something was worrying her.

"We want to help you and be there to support you" I said fervently. "Please don't shut us out." She smiled sadly before nodding her assent.

The day passed relatively smoothly from there. We welcomed Asita and Davide back while attempting to contact all the friends we knew. Alice saw no immediate plans for attack from the Volturi, so I decided that it was time to strategize and let our allies know of the situation instead of rushing into defense mode. Though I did believe some sort of battle would occur, I didn't want to push the attack earlier than necessary with aggressive movement. The rest of the family agreed.

"We've already contacted our Denali cousins. They are staying where they are for the moment but said that they could be here whenever we needed them" Carlisle paced the room, thinking through all the different avenues available. "We'll also need to see if we can contact Amun, Kebi, Tia and Benjamin if they are even still in Egypt."

Edward nodded his agreement. "The nomads will also be important" he said softly. "We don't want the Volturi to start twisting their minds to incite a war against us."

"It is to late to keep the nomads out of the conversation, clearly" I said, gesturing to the window where Davide sat watching Renesmee and Esme's lessons with interest with Asita close at his side. "If there are rumors about us, it is best that we face them directly, even welcome others to come ask us questions about our way of life." There were options open to us for how to approach the hundreds if not thousands of nomads throughout the vampire world.

"Certainly we could reach out to Charles and Makenna, as they seemed open to Renesmee…the last time" Carlise finished hesitantly. "Maybe if we could explain our cause, they might stay out of it."

"Most won't know what to do" Jasper said quietly from the corner. "Think of Alistair. He was terrified of being on the wrong side of the winners in a confrontation. Many will probably think that we are forcing them to choose to be with or against the Volturi."

"Aren't we?" Emmett asked, managing to sound frustrated and eager at the same time. "Either way there will be a change in our world. The Volturi have corrupted their power, taken what they wanted and massacred thousands."

"Emmett's right" I said, "Yes, they have kept order, but at what cost? The rest of our kind must make a decision about what they want to see in the new world. They can stay out of it, but they shouldn't be made to choose a side without knowing what it is that both sides stand for" I finished, working myself almost to anger. I looked over at Edward whose eyes blazed amber with pride.

"Ok, Bella" Carlisle came up to me and put a hand on my shoulder. "We'll start contacting everyone we can. Some of us can leave tonight."

"The wolves aren't going to like this" Edward said quietly while the rest of the family moved into the dining room, strategizing about where each couple should go first.

"I know" I replied. "I was considering the best way to handle this. I'll go find Jake and see if we can find Sam to discuss the situation. Both Alpha's will need to be there. We shouldn't make them fight with us and they won't just let vampires stroll through here while we brew a war."

Edward shrugged his shoulders and sighed but nodded slightly, accepting that discussion was the right route. He still bore some hard feelings against Sam for wanting to kill Renesmee, though we both knew he couldn't do it now.

Leaving Renesmee in the care of our family with strict instructions to allow no practice with Asita or sparring with Jasper, we flew through the woods toward Forks, carefully keeping to the tree-line as we approached La Push.

I heard a heavy heart thumping not too far away and called out loud enough for whoever was scouting to hear "We would like to talk to Sam and Jake. Can you ask them to come, please?"

"It's Leah. She is running back for Jake. Sam must be there too. They are both at Billy's, not too far away" Edward explained as Seth ran away. He frowned as he listened to her thoughts.

"What is it?" I asked gently, sensing the subtle concern denting his brow.

"Billy's sick" he turned to me, concern written across his face, both for my sake and from the connection he had developed with Jacob over the last two years. Billy was like an uncle to me and so close to Charlie. "He started feeling stomach pains a little over a week ago but has gotten worse. Although he has insisted that he does not need to a doctor, I'm pretty sure that Jake is going to force him soon."

My concern for Billy and Jake welled up. I had no idea that Billy was sick and was a little hurt that Jake hadn't said anything, though I suppose I'd been angry enough about yesterday that I hadn't given him a chance to say anything. Guilt streaked through my gut as I considered my anger with Jacob. How many times had I hurt him already? He needed to be with my daughter. I would protect her as much as I could but what could I do for my best friend, the one who had almost fled my world over grief for me? Edward pulled me to him as I felt the pinpricks behind my eyes which could no longer cry tears.

"I had no idea…" I trailed off into his shoulder. I couldn't afford compassion at the moment, however. I forced myself to calm down and turn back to the problem at hand, keeping my family safe. After a moment, I pulled away, looking up into Edward's molten eyes, a look that endowed me with strength. Slowly I heard the pair of heavy heartbeats and softly padding feet that signaled Sam and Jake's approach. I felt the slight shift in the air as they phased back into their human forms and walked toward us through the trees.

"Thank you for coming" I started formally, a façade which broke instantly as I observed Jacob's slumped shoulders. "Oh Jake, I'm so sorry!" I cried, lightly running toward him as I flung my arms around him, becoming enveloped in his rough embrace. I disregarded the repulsive odor his body gave off as I felt him wince from my own smell.

"It will be ok, Jake" Sam said quietly. "Billy's a tough old man. I don't think he's leaving us anytime soon."

I stepped away and felt Jake nod slowly before pulling an arm across his face. I walked back to Edward, prepared to tell the news I had come to give.

"Jake must have told you by now that we believe the Volturi are coming back and probably intend a fight" I said when Jake turned to face us again. "We don't know when, but we aren't prepared to sit around while they amass a force to try to destroy us. We currently believe that they are attempting to manipulate the rest of our world, though Alice is having difficulty seeing their exact course of action. All we know is that it centers around a figure, a vampire new to the guard most likely, that seems to be in all of their plans."

"Who is this vampire?" Sam asked. "What does it mean if Alice does not see it?"

"We aren't sure" I said, feeling frustrated at my own lack of answers. "It could be that they are avoiding telling decisions to the guard in order to go around Alice or that there are outside influences or even that they are not sure they want to fight. It is as yet unclear."

"So what are you doing?" Jacob asked, wary suspicion leaking into his voice.

"We are asking for another meeting of our friends" I explained carefully, picking my words so as to not alert undue fear or anger. "Similar to the Volturi's last 'appearance' we are simply attempting to solidify bonds between those who we call friends."

"And…?" Jake asked, hearing my reluctance to go on. I felt Edward stiffen next to me, ill at ease with whatever thoughts were going through Jake's head.

"Well, we also want to make sure that the Volturi do not take advantage of this opportunity to gather nomads and distort their impressions of our family. So…" I trailed off, uncertain as to how to continue.

"Yes?" Sam's polite voice had a flat edge that hinted at anger. I steeled myself for their response.

"So, we were hoping you might accept that some of the nomads will be in the area, finding out more about our family and deciding whether they are willing to be involved" I finished, a note of authority and strength ringing in my voice. Sam must have heard this shift judging by the way his eyes widened slightly at me.

"Yes, she has taken the position of leadership within our family" Edward answered Sam's unspoken question. "I guess that would be accurate…an 'Alpha' within a vampire family." His lips twisted into a wry smile.

"Well, of course we honor the treaty we made and fight beside our family if it comes to it" Sam responded after thinking for a minute. "Renesmee is part of our family. We would never allow anything to happen to her or to you, our allies. We do not want the nomads on our land or hunting in the area. Who knows? Maybe they will choose to not hunt humans."

"Thank you for your understanding" I replied, relief radiating through my body. I was so grateful to have the support of the packs, though I felt a twinge of fear thinking of them going against the Volturi. "Jake?"

"Well, you can't expect me to just sit by!" He exclaimed, smiling. "Of course I will fight, though I cannot speak for my pack. Though I'm sure that Quil, Embry and Seth at least won't object." He smiled and we heard a growl in the forest. "I guess Leah wants to be part too."

"We appreciate your assistance. I'll let you know if we get other information. Thank you again" I finished, smiling before I turned back toward the house.

The wolves might be on our side, but that did not mean this was over. Not by a long shot.


	12. Changes

**Yes, I know it's been a really long time since I've updated but the next couple of chapters will come quickly! Enjoy!**

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I ran back with a heavy heart. It must have showed all over my face.

"What is it love?" Edward gently inquired as we sped through the forest. Rather than answer I pulled my shield aside, allowing him to follow my train of thoughts.

How long could we do this? I knew that Renesmee and Jake had to be together, but how long could we ask the wolves to stand by while their sworn enemies flocked to the area? Why did I feel like there was something else happening that was just beyond my grasp?

I jumped over logs, through the greenery and approached the Cullen's house. Holding hands we slowed down and walked through the front door. Carlisle and Esme sat reading in the living room.

"Where's Renesmee?" The words flew off my lips.

"She wanted to go hunting" Carlisle said gently.

"Alone?" Edward said quickly, overlapping Carlisle's words. I turned to leave again.

"It seemed like she needed some space" Esme said gently.

"Don't you think…" I started.

"Why don't you give her some time" Carlisle replied softly. "She is already facing massive physical and emotional change, in addition to dealing with uncertain emotions for Jacob and the pain he must be feeling."

I hesitated, allowing my mind to quickly turn over hundreds of situations and possibilities.

"It can't be easy for her, love" Edward said, quietly enough for only me to hear. "It certainly was not easy for me to see you go through pain or…figure out things when I fell in love."

I turned to look at him, molten gold in his eyes, and nodded sadly. It was true, there was only so much we could do to help her get through the pain she was facing.

I sighed. "Ok, let's go back to the cottage to wait for her. No, wait" I stopped myself, turning to Carlisle and Esme. "Carlisle, I wanted to get your perspective on something."

I told him about our discussion with Sam, my reservations about bringing more vampires into the area, and the growing feeling that I was missing something in the equation. I told him the decision I had been coming to, the conviction that our family should change location, not just for the wolves' sake, but for our own as well.

"Well, I completely understand your unease, Bella" Carlisle said pensively. "We'll have to talk to Jacob about this, as it is his allegiance that will be stretched by being away from the pack."  
"Of course," I replied. "Though it will be difficult in the condition that Jake's dad is in right now. We could never ask him to leave in the middle of this."

"Why don't you go check on Billy, but please do call he needs my assistance," Carlisle urged gently. "I know they prefer me not to work on him with so many of the tribe present, but I want to do all I can to ease his pain." Carlisle looked from Esme to Edward. "In the meantime we'll call a family meeting about the possibility of moving."

Edward pulled me to him, tilting my face up to kiss me gently before murmuring, "I'll be here if you need me." He gazed deeply into my eyes and I felt the stirrings of desire before the logical side of my brain pulled me back to the situation at hand and I turned to go to Jake. I sped through the forest alone this time, stopping at the border to wait for my 'escort'.

"Hey, Leah," I called out into the forest. "I know you don't want me here, but I was hoping I could come and see Billy. I really want to see if he's okay." My voice cracked with emotion. I heard her loping through the woods toward me. "Thank you."

A slight shimmer sifted the air as she phased back to her human self. "Don't thank me yet," she said, gruffly. "You haven't seen Billy. He's…in much worse shape than he seems to think." I could tell that through her tough façade, she was just as worried about Billy as I was. "Come on, let's go on foot."

Tense as our relationship always was, she had developed a grudging friendship with me, especially now that we were technically step-sisters.

Billy was much worse than Jake or any of the rest of the tribe was willing to admit. As soon as I walked into the nearly silent house, I heard the weakness of Billy's heartbeat, the ragged breaths he took as he struggled against the pain. I called Carlisle as soon as Jake would let me.

After doing a cursory check with an increasingly serious expression on his face, Carlisle convinced Jake to take Billy to a hospital.

"Billy has advanced stomach cancer" Carlisle explained slowly to Jake after running a few tests. "It must have been hurting him for months, maybe even years." He sighed slowly, "I'm sorry Jake, but his condition is too advanced to treat. We can keep him comfortable and give him drugs so he doesn't feel pain, but…" Carlisle trailed off, sorrow etched into his flawless face.

"How long?" Jake said roughly.

Carlisle hesitated, taking a deep breath and letting out slowly before answering quietly, "A few days, maybe a week. I'm so sorry Jacob."

Jacob crumpled at his words, staggering until I helped guide him to a seat, Carlisle's words seeming to wound him physically.


	13. Pain and Tradition

**New chapters keep coming! Review if you want, otherwise just enjoy!**

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The next week was nearly impossible to handle. I split my time between trying to support Jake, and doing all the other tasks that needed my attention. Rachel was already in La Push to be with Paul, but Jake's other sister, Rebecca, needed to be called and brought in.

On top of that, Renesmee continued to pull away from Edward and me, spending time with Jake to show her support but mostly staying in the woods, hunting and doing whatever it was she did to occupy her time. When I told her about leaving, she accepted it passively, drawing into herself and refusing to discuss it with us. Edward suggested letting down my shield so he could get a glimpse into her thoughts, but her mind was the one thing that I still had power to protect, the one area where I had control. It had simply become instinct to protect her mind against attack.

At the same time, I was dealing with preparations for my family's move to New Hampshire, where the Cullen's owned a home in the mountains. Though Esme had some reservations about leaving a safe place where many vampires knew our location to one that virtually no one had heard of, Alice convinced her that it would be safer for the wolves to not have interested vampires wandering though the wolves' territory. As they packed up, they only waited for Edward, Renesmee and me to leave.

Of course it came time to tell Charlie. He was already broken up about Billy and I could tell it wounded him to know that we were leaving.

"Now, Bells?" Charlie's voice cracked, staring through the hospital glass window into Billy's room. "Can't you wait for...for at least a few months?"

"It has to be now, Dad" I said, trying my hardest not to hurt his feelings more than I already had. "Look at Renesmee," I nodded toward her still form, holding Jake's hand as he knelt over Billy's bedside. "People are already starting to get suspicious about her rapid growth in the few times they've seen her.

We also need to move, Dad. Esme wants to move closer to her family, Carlisle has a teaching job lined up at a medical school, and Edward and I want to take classes out East. We have to move in time for the new semester" I told him, the lie that we had concocted falling from my lips with a false note. Charlie looked at me sharply for a minute before his face fell again into a frown.

"Yeah, I guess you're right" he said sadly. "Knew it was gonna happen, just a matter of when."

He paused when another thought entered his head. "What about Jake? Would he just let you and Nessie move away?"

I took a second to think about my phrasing. Even my usually clueless father had seen the connection between Renesmee and Jake.

"He's coming with us, Dad. After…well…you know" Charlie nodded roughly, tears welling in his eyes. "He said getting away from Forks for a little while might be a good idea. He'll be back often, but he wants to go wherever we do."

"Well," Charlie said after heaving a deep, sad sigh. "I'll miss you Bells. You better visit home here a lot."

"Of course, Dad" I said as I pulled him into what I hoped was not a bone-crushing hug. Sue Clearwater came up from down the hall with two cups of coffee, ending our conversation. Charlie would be ok. He would be safer, and, I knew, not alone.

The day it happened seemed so usual. Just like any day. It dawned grey with drizzle falling softly. After a night of gazing out Carlisle and Esme's window with Edward silent at my side, my phone buzzed quietly. Before it was over I answered.

"Jake?"

"He's…" Seth's voice cracked. "He's not doing well, Bella." Seth took in a ragged breath. "Dr. Cullen…he says it will be in the next hour or so."

"I'm coming" I said, already halfway out of the door with Edward keeping in stride.

"Wait, Edward" I stopped, turning to him. "Get Renesmee. No matter how she's feeling toward him or us right now, she'd want to be there."

He gazed into my eyes before nodding slightly as I turned back, jumping on my motorcycle because I knew it was the easiest way to get to the hospital without suspicion.

Within the hour, Billy was gone. As I looked at Jake, I noticed a light had gone out in his eyes. Pain radiated off his still huge but shrunken frame. He collapsed on to me, soundlessly sobbing as I easily held up weight that would have crushed me just a few years ago. Tears I would never cry pricked at my eyes as I held my best friend. When he finally released me to go hug family and friends, I turned to my father who stood with Renesmee. The expression on my father's face was pure sorrow, and as I went to hug him, I glanced at Renesmee. I expected her to be looking for Jake but instead her stare was only for me. The expression was one that took my breath away. No sorrow, no pain, just raw, unadulterated rage.

I glanced away and then back to her and suddenly her face was smooth, sadness for Jake speaking through her eyes. Had I just imagined that terrifying expression? I shook myself slightly, allowing my father to fall into my arms as he cried.

Just in time for the funeral the next day, the rain stopped. Alice assured me with a tad of annoyance that it shouldn't get sunny anytime soon, though the wolves prevented her from knowing for certain. In a traditional ceremony, the tribe paid homage to their leader, their elder. A memorial was done on land with Quileute songs before he was brought to James Island, the traditional burial ground for chiefs of the tribe. Since only Quileute were allowed onto the island, we stood on First Beach with the permission of the tribe, watching them take Billy away across the water.

As they rowed away I looked down the beach where Jacob and I had gotten to know each other. The place where I learned the Quileute legends about what Edward was and what I was now. The rest of the tribe stood a distance down the beach from where I and my family stood, refusing to pay attention to us. It solidified in my mind the need for us to leave. The legends of La Push must once again become legend.


	14. Separation

The dark green of the thick forest whipped past me, fading to a blur as I pushed the limits of what my tireless muscles could do. Aimless, I instinctively watched every leaf on every tree as if in slow motion, yet stopped paying attention as I allowed my grief to occupy my mind.

Soundlessly I screamed as all my thoughts revolved around her face. My child, my little girl, all grown up in the shortest childhood a child would ever have.

Renesmee was gone.

Gone.

Forever?

The thought stopped me short, taking my breath away as I collapsed to my knees on the forest floor. A part of my brain registered the feeling of my heart breaking, yet again. Tears that would never fall pricked my eyes.

Only ten days ago life had seemed so simple. Before Billy got sick, before my daughter pulled away from me, before…

Life can certainly change quickly.

She could blend into the human world if she wanted to. She certainly had enough money and was smart enough to disappear forever if she wanted. The few words of the note she left behind felt like a blow every time I thought about them.

_I don't belong here. I don't want to be a freak anymore. I'm leaving. Don't look for me._

_Renesmee_

Grief quickly turned to guilt as the world spun above me. Was she running from me? Was I not the mother I should have been? I left care of her to others while I enjoyed myself and my new life, while I became the leader that lay dormant for so long. Did I miss her signs of unhappiness? In blocking her thoughts from Edward, was I really the one to blame? Could it have been, not a kidnapping like we thought, and maybe hoped, it was, but an attempt at escape into a different life?

I thought of that look I had seen on her face in the hospital. Rage, jealousy, maybe. And then those words that Edward had uttered when we were all sitting in shocked silence after finding the note. _I thought I saw a plan to leave in her thoughts, but I figured it was part of our planned departure. I thought that she just needed some time alone. It went away so quickly from her mind that I thought it was only a passing fancy._

Just as quickly guilt spiraled into rage, red hot and all-consuming. I was back on my feet in an instant, running faster, pushing myself harder.

Why didn't he see? Why didn't he tell me what he suspected? Was he trying to protect me? Why was I always the weak one to him? No matter what I had gone through, suffered, given up, he still saw me as a weak, breakable human, unable to handle the demands of his world. _You're handling it now_, a voice within me said.

More boiling rage surged through me when I thought about those that would capture her, the would-be kidnappers. I realized the Volturi suddenly had a golden opportunity, but if they thought they could take away my child without the full force of my fury coming down on them, they were sorely mistaken.

I sensed a presence at my back, hearing footsteps trying to catch up with me as I pushed myself. Knowing he would hear I yelled, "Go away!"

I couldn't, wouldn't be with him right now. Though I knew my sense of blame was, perhaps, not totally fair, Edward's face in my mind only conjured anger right now. Yes, he was my love. And he was one of the most important things in my life, but he wasn't the only one. Seeing him would hurt more than my silent heart could take right now.

Still I heard his footsteps approaching, gaining on me steadily. I stopped abruptly and spun to face him head on, ready to fight if need be. I loved him, but I was past the point of reason, something he should have understood, and given me my space.

Edward wasn't the one to enter the clearing, though. Jasper approached me slowly, hands up, attempting to surrender to what I'm sure he felt was a strong and hostile urge to attack.

"Hold on, Bella" he said calmly. "I just want to talk to you for a minute."

I quickly judged the situation. He had stopped 50 yards away, just far enough that if I did attack, he could move out of the way and counter-attack. I had improved in combat in the last few months, but I didn't think I was good enough to take on Jasper quite yet. Still I bared my teeth and stayed in my crouch. I wasn't ready to be logical yet, even if it meant attacking my brother.

I felt a calming influence assert itself on my body and snarled.

"Stop it," I yelled. "Or I swear, Jasper, no matter if you are my brother-in-law or not, I will attack you." Just to emphasize my point I focused on the rage swirling in my mind, knowing he would feel its depth and power.

"Ok, ok," Jasper said calmly before taking a deep breath and speaking. "I know how you feel, Bella. You know I do. We are all feeling the pain of Renesmee's absence and the guilt that we should have been able to stop it. We are _all _hurting" he said firmly, allowing a second to let it sink in even as I snarled in protest.

"Yes, Edward is hurting too, even more so without you there to be with him" he continued through my protest.

"Edward! He doesn't know _anything_ about what I'm feeling." I yelled back bitterly. "So content to let me take the lead. So content to let me do what I want, but never letting me be myself. Am I just a weak puppet to Edward? A pawn in the leadership of this family? I can't help but to love him. I can't help but to lead. I have no choice! He stole my choice from me when he came into my life."

"But Bella," he continued before I could interject more, "you have to understand that it isn't just Edward who needs you. We all need you. You are a part of our family. Think of Esme, Carlisle, and Alice. They love you. We all love you. And we all need you to lead this family because that is what you are. You are stronger than your guilt, rage, and emotions. We need you to be strong for us, because otherwise, what will become of our family?" Jasper trailed off, as the words were swallowed into the forest.

I thought over his words. I knew that without me they would be blind, leaderless. Sure, they would survive, but I had taken a place within the family that could not be reversed. With dry humor, I supposed this is what Jake must have felt in becoming an Alpha.

Jasper must have felt my calculation and left me in silence as I slowly stood, suppressing the well of emotion that threatened to consume me once again, with a new emotion added to the mix, self-loathing. I couldn't afford to blame Edward. He was everything to me, especially now. Still, I knew I had said what was in my heart, and that once he heard it from Jasper, we could never be the same.

I nodded once, accepting his advice, but not allowing him in on my thoughts.

I will hold out, settle my affairs with my adopted family, and find her. She was out there, somewhere in the forest, miles away by now. Who knows? Maybe I was good at finding the remnants of my child. I was certainly good at destroying her. I winced at the thought and felt Jasper's wordless appraisal of me as we ran slowly back to the house.

I traced over the few facts that I had on that too-short run. She had taken a few pairs of jeans and shirts from her closet, a stash of money, and my motorcycle, and gone to Seattle. After that, her scent disappeared as if it was erased from the area. As of now, that's all we knew. Alice couldn't see where she was. Edward (I cringed slightly at the name) couldn't sense her in the area. How she had gotten so far, so quickly, without any of us picking up her scent, none of us knew.

But I did know one thing. I would find her before the Volturi.

I had to.

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**Just so I don't deal with lots of angry comments, no one's relationship is perfect. Even the best relationships have fights. I also didn't think it was healthy to have such an emotionally dependent relationship between Bella and Edward. They need to be their own people before they can be together....just my philosophy...**


	15. Bound

**Another chapter! Please read and review if you like/don't like what's going on. As always, I don't own anything about Stephenie Meyer's work, but I do believe there are some aspects of her story that are unrealistic, especially in terms of relationships between characters. Don't worry, there might just be redemption in the end...Maybe...**

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I recognized the expression on his face, anger, guilt, extreme pain. It was the expression Renesmee had shown me from her earliest memories, a view of Edward's face as she had looked up at him, as he looked at my changing body. It was the expression that must be written across my face now.

His words echoed around the still, white house.

"_What_ did you say?" I snarled, crouching in an attack position, every nerve on fire.

"Renesmee is _my daughter too_" Edward repeated, standing straight up in front of me, his black eyes staring at me.

It was the first time he had spoken since Jasper and I had returned. I had tried to ignore his still form crumpled on the stairs, fighting both my impulses to kiss him and to attack him.

The whole family was gathered, Rosalie and Emmett by the kitchen door, identical expressions of pain on their faces. Jasper went to Alice by the wall of windows while Esme and Carlisle rose lightly from the couch.

Esme came to embrace me but I just turned aside, not allowing myself to feel emotion in that moment. I calmly explained to them that I was leaving as soon as possible. They could still move to Dartmouth if they wanted, or not, but I wouldn't be with them either way.

Esme interrupted, of course, her voice full of tears, "Bella, you don't have to do that!" she cried, reaching out to me. "We are here for you. We all love Renesmee and will search for her. We love you both so much."

"No, Esme" I said firmly. "It has to be just me. She's my daughter. If I've failed as a mother and she's running away from that…" my voice cracked as emotion broke through. I quickly stifled it. "Then it's my responsibility to find her."

Esme continued to argue before Alice broke in, "But Bella, what makes you think you'll find her better alone that with the rest of us? We have all been searching for answers. We _all _are trying to think of places we can go. Emmett and Rose have already come up with a few,"

"No, Alice!" I shouted, starting to let my anger through. "Don't you understand? She ran away from me! From this family!"

"You aren't the only one who loves Nessie!" Rose shot back. "How can you think we won't do everything in our power to get her back?"

"No!" I yelled, my anger bursting out. "She's my daughter! My responsibility, _my failure_!"

"She's _my daughter too!_" Edward spoke, raising his head to glare at me.

"_What_ did you say?"

"Renesmee is _my daughter too_" he repeated. "What makes you think that you are the only one responsible for her? What makes you think _you_ are the only one who is hurting?" He paused, then stood, walking up the stairs and closing his old bedroom door.

His words cut me even more than I had expected

Alice pounced on my stunned silence, listing in her most persuasive voice all the reasons that I couldn't leave, that the family needed me, that she needed me, and that she couldn't see me succeed anyway…

My head snapped towards her when she said that, but her face was the epitome of innocent hurt.

"Please Bella?" Alice said gently, genuinely pleading. I felt Jasper's influence as my body relaxed. I allowed it.

"Fine. I'll stay" I said, knowing that I couldn't escape without loads more guilt than I felt right now. I briefly thought about running in the middle of the night, but, glancing back at Alice, knew that she would know right away what I was planning. I would just have to find a way to deal with being around them, and around him, for a little while longer.

I walked through the kitchen and out the back door, staring through the trees and river to the mountains. Instead of accepting their beauty and the exquisite color perceived by my eyes, all I could think about was Renesmee.

Where was she?

Could she find food?

Was she alone?

If not, who was she with?

Even if she didn't know it, she was still a child, my baby.

I heard steps behind me and continued to stare ahead as Carlisle came up and stood beside me.

"Bella," he said sympathetically. "We have been doing research to try to find…Renesmee. We want to go over our ideas with you and see what you think."

I nodded slightly and continued to stare away.

"There is also another issue that we need your help on," he explained slowly, carefully choosing words.

"What?" I asked as he paused again.

"Jacob" he replied quietly, almost as if afraid to remind me.

I let out the breath I didn't know I had been holding. "Jake! Oh!" I whispered, pain lancing through me again. How could I have been so selfish as to forget my best friend? He loved my daughter, practically worshipped her. How could I explain this to him?

"We think he has a right to know, as does the tribe" Carlisle continued.

"Of course…" I murmured. "I'll have to go tell him."

Carlisle started to ask if he wanted me to go with him but I interrupted,

"No, I need to do this alone" I said firmly.

Carlisle rested his hand on my shoulder, squeezing slightly before turning back to the house.

I couldn't even begin to think about the pain I would be causing on top of the loss of his dad. I'd have to be strong for him, just like I was for everyone else.

As I stumbled out of Jake's house, what had been the middle of the day had turned to night. I felt empty, emotionless. It took everything not to take off and run in the opposite direction, provoke the Volturi, maybe, or just get a random wanderer to finish me off. The expression on his face was burned into my consciousness.

Jacob, looking like he had gotten smacked across the face by his best friend. The intense pain, betrayal, and heartbreak smashed what was left of my heart into the ground. Every time he looked at me it was as if someone were stomping on me, stabbing me with thousands of knives. The one person I had vowed to never hurt again. Broken. Compared to my transformation, this was nothing.

At first he hadn't believed it, thought it was some cruel joke that I had created. I explained all that we knew, what we wanted to do to get her back, but I don't think he heard a word. I thought I had seen his spirit leave him when Billy died but this, coming on the heels of such intense grief, sucked everything out of him as my words sunk in.

Not even a person, he looked like a shell. A small part of my mind wondered if this was the horror that people had seen when they looked at me after Edward left. When I thought he'd be gone for good. Without wanting them too, those memories suddenly appeared, another accusing glare into my life, another stab of anger toward Edward. Why couldn't I be anything without him? I knew that no matter how far I ran, I couldn't survive being away from him. That dependence frightened me now. Now that I would do anything to get my daughter back, even break us apart.

Somehow I refocused on the defeated man in front of me. All I could do was be there, hold him, tell him that it would be ok, even though I didn't have a clue in hell how that could be. So I held him… for hours.

Finally, knowing I had work to get done, I called Seth to take care of Jake. I didn't believe I could leave him here alone. Selfishly, I realized that I couldn't lose anyone else. I wouldn't lose Jake.

As Seth walked through the door I made to get up but was suddenly held back.

"Wait, Bella," he said fervently, his tortured eyes looking into mine. "Promise me you won't leave without me" he exhaled in one breath. "I…can't…I can't be here without…" he trailed off as his eyes searched for what he knew wouldn't be there. He choked back a sob.

"Please" he whispered as he locked his eyes on mine, paying no attention to the tears that had silently begun to flow.

"I promise, Jake" I replied. "You'll come with us when you leave."

He nodded once before falling back into the sofa. It was the least I could promise him. As I explained the situation to a horrified Seth, I realized that neither of us was free. I was bound to my love, just like he was bound to his connection to Renesmee. We each had our responsibilities, our torments, our heartbreaks. Both of us were bound.


	16. Collision

**For those of you uncomfortable with the Bella/Edward tensions...good luck with this chapter :) As always, read and review if you like. It's always nice to hear input or just get a perspective on how randomly the story is going...**

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I left my car at Jacob's and started running. I knew, though, that no matter how fast I ran or where I went, I couldn't escape from the expression now burned into my perfect memory. It was a short run back to the house, so I shifted course, running to the place that had seemed so safe, the pasture that once held such happy memories. Maybe it could bring me back now. I hoped against hope that somehow I could deaden this pain.

As I walked up to the pasture the wind shifted and a scent hit me in the face, so familiar and so unwelcome. For a brief moment, I considered turning and running in the opposite direction, but even with all the anger I felt toward him I was still drawn in, as if a wire connected me to him that reeled me in, overriding choice. Between the anger that he evoked and the pain that came from being with Jake, I knew that this was not the place I wanted to be right now. Still, I couldn't avoid it. Instead, I steeled myself and shut down my emotion as I drew nearer to Edward's still figure in the middle of our field.

He stood facing toward me as I emerged from the woods, a calm mask on his face. We stood silently facing each other and I read pain in his eyes as he took in my deadened expression.

"What do you want, Edward?" I broke the silence, suddenly feeling so tired and worn down.

"I needed…" he started, taking a step toward me before catching himself. "I wanted to see how you were. I wanted to see how Jacob was doing."

In any other circumstance I would have been touched by his concern for Jacob, their relationship was always so touchy. Now, the name just stung me deeper.

"I don't need you to check up on me" I replied, avoiding the subject of Jake, altogether.

"Why?" his voice broke with desperation, despair breaking through the mask of calm. It was almost as if he was burning from the inside, pained every time he looked at me, tortured whenever he heard me speak. At least, that was how I was feeling, although for possibly different reasons.

"Why won't you talk to me?" he tried again. "I'm hurting too, more than you can know. I loved her too, how can you shut me out? Please, Bella…" he reached out to me across the 50 yards between us, as if he could bridge the gap with so small a gesture. "I don't know how to…" he searched for words as his eyes stayed locked on me. "I don't know how to…_be_ without you…"

"Well, I don't want to _be_ with you," I laughed one short dry laugh, mocking him, then turned deadly serious. "How do you expect me to be around you, every day, when it taunts me, an accusation of something _I_ should have done better? That _you_ should have done better? You talk about her as if she's dead, as if because _I've failed_ she is gone forever. Why does it _always have to be me_! Every time I see you I'm disgusted with you and disgusted with me. So no, Edward" I spit his name back at him and watched him wince. "I don't want to _be_ with you."

I turned to go, an unexpected pain pulled in my chest as I saw him fall to his knees from the corner of my eye, as if I had punched him as hard as I could in the chest, the wind sucked from his chest.

"Wait," he said weakly.

I ground my teeth in frustration as I kept my back to him.

"Wait for what?" I said quietly, almost to myself.

After a pause his voice returned, gaining strength with every word, "You think you can just get rid of me? You think you can leave me and disregard what we have? Our family?" he was yelling by this point. "It's going to take more than that to make me leave! _You are my wife! She is my daughter!_" He took a deep breath before saying firmly. "Renesmee is my daughter and I will fight to get her back too. Just like I will fight for you, even if you don't want it!"

I whipped around as he said her name. _Renesmee_. My daughter. Hearing him say it was like he had taken the heart buried in my chest and twisted it. Agony.

"_Don't say her name_" I hissed, lowering into an attack position. "If you loved her, you _should have protected her_."

"You think this is _my fault_?" he snarled back, jumping to his feet as he mirrored my stance.

"I don't know _what_ to think," I said mockingly as I glared into his black eyes.

"Ha," he growled back, "So you just want to _dispose_ of me, move on to the next boy. Maybe _that's _what you were doing while 'comforting' Jacob…"

I screamed in rage at Jake's name, not allowing him to finish his sentence before I attacked. He almost seemed to welcome it as he lunged toward me. We crashed into each other as I kicked off of him. Without the advantage of reading my moves, he almost acted blindly, punching toward me as I danced back. He seemed distracted for a second, his head shaking as if brushing off a fly, so I took advantage, kicking him hard in the gut. I realized my months of combat training had paid off, even if not in the way either of us had expected.

I backpedaled twenty yards as he spun back to his feet, snarling at me again. I ran toward and jumped, making it over him and low quick enough to bite his leg, though not as hard as I'd like. Suddenly I felt a knife-like pain in my shoulder, hearing the sound of my flesh tearing before I could let go and run away. I fell back to regroup as we circled each other.

Just then, I heard movement in the trees to the right of us and instinctively angled myself to see what was coming.

"Wait!" Alice's and Esme's voices emerged through the trees just before they broke through along with the rest of the family.

"Bella! Edward! Stop!" Alice gasped, taking in my torn shoulder and Edward's slight limp. She ran between us, close enough for either of us to easily attack.

"Get away, Alice!" Edward spat, his expression unlike anything I'd seen before. Terrifyingly angry.

She turned to him. "Edward, what are you _thinking_?" She locked eyes with him, slowly walking closer to him. I resisted the urge to pull her away, though heard Jasper hiss as she went up to him.

Edward held her stare, wincing slightly at something he must have seen in her thoughts and growling slightly. Jasper started forward but, without breaking eye contact, Alice held up a hand to calm him. Edward's expression slowly shifted from anger to deep sadness. After holding a few seconds he stood, nodding once at her. She smiled sadly and stepped back.

His eyes turned to me.

"I won't fight you anymore, Bella" he said sadly.

His statement, said so calmly, only infuriated me.

"Why not?" I taunted, laughing drily. "Scared?" I ran at him, hitting him to the ground. He didn't avoid my blows, allowing himself to be hit but sitting up again. I punched again, stronger, in his stomach.

"Fight back!" I screamed. "Are you just going to leave it like that? Do you care so little about me that you'll just give me up?" I kicked his leg, the one I had already injured, forcing his leg to buckle as he fell to the ground. Behind me I heard Esme cry out.

"Fight back! Fight back!" My screams turned to dry sobs as I fell to my knees. My anger, resentment, grief, pain all welled to the surface, completely beyond my control. My head fell forward as I wrapped my arms tightly around my body, rocking back at forth. All the emotion that I had blocked out since I first read her note consumed me, forcing me to feel everything, overcoming the numbness I didn't realize I had imposed on myself. Though I had felt anger, betrayal, and grief, the depth of those feelings was nothing compared to this. From somewhere beyond my pain I realized that Edward had come to me, wrapping his arms around my body. I tried to push him off but couldn't make my arms respond. My mind was too far gone in pain.

A part of my mind recognized that I was being picked up and carried, that the woods flashed by I closed my eyes in a desperate attempt to shut out the world, but the pain continued. I felt myself being laid on something. I couldn't cry to ease the pain. I couldn't sleep to forget. My mind only knew pain. Escapeless, ceaseless pain.

--

I didn't recognize day or night. Time was meaningless. At some point I realized how similar it was to the transformation I had undergone. Then, my body burned like a thousand of the hottest fires and my heart beat its way toward its own demise. Then I managed to get by because I remembered why I wanted it. I remembered what was waiting for me at the end.

This pain, I grasped, was so much worse. My body could pull out of the pain, but my mind? It was as if it was stabbed and burned, but not physically. Each memory that came to the surface unbidden stabbed me. Each glimpse of her face felt like a red-hot poker. Could I ever escape this torment? Did I want to?


End file.
